3/30/19 CUBS (Yuuuuuuu've got what I neeeeeed) @ TexASS Rangers (*checks notes* EDINSON VOLQUEZ?!?) - 7:05 CST - NBCSCH

[jersey cubs fan]

I'm fuzzy about the math for things such as the vaunted Kris Bryant Days Without a Dong-o-Meter; would today be 1 day without a dong? Or does 1 full day without a dong have to pass for it technically be 1 day without a dong?

its your dong meter, you set the parameters

[Sammy Sofa]

I'm fuzzy about the math for things such as the vaunted Kris Bryant Days Without a Dong-o-Meter; would today be 1 day without a dong? Or does 1 full day without a dong have to pass for it technically be 1 day without a dong?

its your dong meter, you set the parameters

 

[squally1313]

I'm fuzzy about the math for things such as the vaunted Kris Bryant Days Without a Dong-o-Meter; would today be 1 day without a dong? Or does 1 full day without a dong have to pass for it technically be 1 day without a dong?

its your dong meter, you set the parameters

 

So like, when it's been 3 days, Sofa will tell everyone it's actually been 6?

[Hairyducked Idiot]

I'm fuzzy about the math for things such as the vaunted Kris Bryant Days Without a Dong-o-Meter; would today be 1 day without a dong? Or does 1 full day without a dong have to pass for it technically be 1 day without a dong?

 

0 days without a dong, 1 day since his last dong

[WrigleyField 22]

I'm fuzzy about the math for things such as the vaunted Kris Bryant Days Without a Dong-o-Meter; would today be 1 day without a dong? Or does 1 full day without a dong have to pass for it technically be 1 day without a dong?

Track it in minutes so there's less ambiguity.

[jersey cubs fan]

I'm fuzzy about the math for things such as the vaunted Kris Bryant Days Without a Dong-o-Meter; would today be 1 day without a dong? Or does 1 full day without a dong have to pass for it technically be 1 day without a dong?

its your dong meter, you set the parameters

 

So like, when it's been 3 days, Sofa will tell everyone it's actually been 6?

 

we let him do what he's gonna do

 

[BigSlick]

I still don’t quite believe that Yu is real so tonight will be enlightening

[imb]

I still don’t quite believe that Yu is real so tonight will be enlightening

 

I can guarantee you don’t learn anything tonight you didn’t already know

[Sammy Sofa]

Maybe he's meeting him for dinner.

[Ding Dong Johnson]

I still don’t quite believe that Yu is real so tonight will be enlightening

 

I can guarantee you don’t learn anything tonight you didn’t already know

Yu never know.

[Brian]

I still don’t quite believe that Yu is real so tonight will be enlightening

 

I can guarantee you don’t learn anything tonight you didn’t already know

Yu never know.

 

yu oughta know

[Sammy Sofa]

 

I can guarantee you don’t learn anything tonight you didn’t already know

Yu never know.

 

Yu, yu, yu oughta know

[JudasIscariotTheBird]

Little known fact: Flea and Dave Navarro are playing on the album recording of that track.

[minnesotacubsfan]

dance YUr self clean boys

[David]

amazes me how people forget about the post opening day off day every year.

 

it pisses me off so badly that i couldn't possibly forget about it.

[Andy]

amazes me how people forget about the post opening day off day every year.

 

it pisses me off so badly that i couldn't possibly forget about it.

One upshot about opening last season in Miami was we didn't have one.

 

I wouldn't want a domed home stadium, but there are times I see the appeal.

[OleMissCub]

Javy Baez is on pace for 328 HRs and 728 RBIs this season. MLB is so fvcked

[Brian707]

Javy Baez is on pace for 328 HRs and 728 RBIs this season. MLB is so fvcked

 

 

[Tim]

Javy Baez is on pace for 328 HRs and 728 RBIs this season. MLB is so fvcked

Predicting a three way tie for first place that requires two additional regular season games to determine playoff teams?

[Cubswin11]

This lineup fucks

 

[Bertz]

We're going to need the "stop stop he's already dead" gif by the fourth inning tonight

[UMFan83]

This lineup horsefeathers

 

 

88.89% of it fucks

[Ding Dong Johnson]

This lineup horsefeathers

 

They will score 1.

[champaignchris]

I think walking Rizzo in front of Baez is generally going to work out poorly for the opposing team this year.

[Aaron_Kennelly]

Bazinga!