Fox Sports: Ramirez SIGNS WITH CUBS!

sethuel1 · November 12, 2006

I already did

*vomits*

*vomits**vomits*

*vomits*

A New Era · November 12, 2006

Woah, that's alot of vomits!!

jmajew · November 12, 2006

So I just came home from watching Alonzo Spellman doing some cage fighting and all I could think about was tossing Hendry in the ring with Spellman. Granted Spellman looked like garbage and barely won but he was one scary looking dude and he would wipe the floor with Hendry. I kept telling myself not to think about stuff like that because it wasn't cool and that Hendry would have Ramirez signed by the time I got home. But now that I am home I wish i would have imagined the dude Spellman fought was Hendry.

I am completey disgusted. I think Ramirez is asking for too muc hand isn't worth as much as he is going to recieve but the Cubs still needed to sign him. AT this point in time I see no reason to watch a single Cubs game next year....Every day I am beginning to gain more and more respect for the White Sox and Kenny Williams. NO matter what Kenny tries to make his team better, sometimes his ideas fail, but atleast he tries which is way more than I can say about Hendry. (At least it appears that way). I will still never be a Sox fan, but for the first time in a long time I feel I can honestly say I admire their organization and I hope one day the Cubs coudl reach their level.

edit: If Hendry ends up resigning Aramis I will take back half of what I said. I would no longer regret my decision to stop myself from imagining Spellman pummelling Hendry. either way Hendry must go.

Edited November 12, 2006 by jmajew

frostwyrm · November 12, 2006

Alright, I'm a bit drunk too, but I don't see any proof that the Cubs are out of the bidding for Aramis. He just wants to get full market value for his services and going to free agency is the best way to ensure that outcome. Hendry has the money and motive to match and if necessary beat full market value. It could still happen.

snoodmonger · November 12, 2006

Be sure to sleep on your stomach tonight, Seth

eat me, fellow cubs fan

lol.

WrigleyField 22 · November 12, 2006

I'm only caught up to page 60 but finding this thread 30 pages up is no good, especially drunk... god cubs!

ToupeeOnFire · November 12, 2006

So I just came home from watching Alonzo Spellman doing some cage fighting and all I could think about was tossing Hendry in the ring with Spellman. Granted Spellman looked like garbage and barely won but he was one scary looking dude and he would wipe the floor with Hendry. I kept telling myself not to think about stuff like that because it wasn't cool and that Hendry would have Ramirez signed by the time I got home. But now that I am home I wish i would have imagined the dude Spellman fought was Hendry.

I always thought Spellman could have made a name for himself in the NFL if he had his head screwed on straight. He had all the talent in the world.

Now that he is in the fight game, I wonder how he'd fair against the Fridge? Or former Chicago Bear washout (and steroid monster) Bob Sapp?

Although my dislike for Hendry has reached intense levels, I take solace in the fact that he is likely gone once the Cubs are sold to rich owners who actually give a damn; are willing to do whatever it takes to win; and will not suffer incompetence from their unders. Or at least, against my better judgement, I foolishly hope.

Andy · November 12, 2006

I got the drunkest I've ever been in my life tonight (not much) and it didn't even have to do with Aramis. And it felt good, lemme tell ya.

This thread, all circumstances aside, is among the most hilarious on NSBB I've ever seen.

WrigleyField 22 · November 12, 2006

pk god, im only up to like page 67 and like ndstops very drunk but not cuz of the ciubbies.... simply put whats the deal?

is the rumor only that hes not signing with the cubs or has another team swooped in?

WrigleyField 22 · November 12, 2006

I just came to the realization that I was only caught up to pae 67 cuz i thought this was the old ARAM thread... this is new I guess..

WHATS HAPPENING

WrigleyField 22 · November 12, 2006

pk god, im only up to like page 67 and like ndstops very drunk but not cuz of the ciubbies.... simply put whats the deal?

is the rumor only that hes not signing with the cubs or has another team swooped in?

at 3:30 (now 4:00) nonetheless.....

soccer10k · November 12, 2006

I got the drunkest I've ever been in my life tonight (not much) and it didn't even have to do with Aramis. And it felt good, lemme tell ya.

This thread, all circumstances aside, is among the most hilarious on NSBB I've ever seen.

OleMissCub + game thread.

ToupeeOnFire · November 12, 2006

Some day, there is going to be an acadamic study correlating alcoholism with being a Cub fan. As if Harry Caray wasn't proof enough.

As I see it, if the Cubs can sign Soriano to play second and J.D. Drew to play center, losing Aramis won't be such a hit. If they can do that, while finding an semi-adequate replacement at third and getting a couple of half-way decent starters, I will be happy.

I don't think the above scenario is impossible given the Cubs' situation, financial framework, and current market .

The ball is in your court Jimbo -- only you can prevent yourself from being tossed out on your ass.

snoodmonger · November 12, 2006

I just came to the realization that I was only caught up to pae 67 cuz i thought this was the old ARAM thread... this is new I guess..

WHATS HAPPENING

I think I can break this down.

•our exclusive negotiating window w/ ARam has closed.

•Hendry may have never gotten past a paltry 5/73.

•In a preemtptive strike against fan apathy, John McDonough set into motion a plan that will invite additional guest singers between the 2nd, 3rd, and 5th innings of every home game.

•It was revelaed that Jim Hendry, due to anatomical shortcomings, is invulnerable to a swift kick to the "charlie brown."

•The news had stunning, dramatic effects on NSBB posters.

•USSoccer climbed into a full bathtub while holding his plugged-in toaster.

•O_O reached new levels of anger for him, which is roughly 1/4 as angry as Gooney is on any given day.

•OleMiss converted to radical Islam; JR bought a Prius

•Treeman injected heroin into his forehead on Hendry's doorstep. He is now dead.

•Sethuel tried to do so as well, but the needle didn't penetrate the six-inch layer of vomit covering his face. A full recovery is excpected.

•ndistops bought a 6-pack and passed out 3/4 of the way through the first can. It should be noted it was a 6-pack of cream soda.

•The angels or dodgers will swoop in and compensate ARam fairly.

•One of Scott Brosius/Shane Andrews/Kevin Orie/Steve Buechele will be ARAM's replacement.

•Last year's team will soon look like a juggernaut compared to waht we're going to assemble.

•All hope is lost.

hope that helps.

soccer10k · November 12, 2006

•ndistops bought a 6-pack and passed out 3/4 of the way through the first can. It should be noted it was a 6-pack of cream soda.

IMO, the funniest line. Excellent.

WrigleyField 22 · November 12, 2006

I just came to the realization that I was only caught up to pae 67 cuz i thought this was the old ARAM thread... this is new I guess..

WHATS HAPPENING

I think I can break this down.

•our exclusive negotiating window w/ ARam has closed.
•Hendry may have never gotten past a paltry 5/73.
•In a preemtptive strike against fan apathy, John McDonough set into motion a plan that will invite additional guest singers between the 2nd, 3rd, and 5th innings of every home game.
•It was revelaed that Jim Hendry, due to anatomical shortcomings, is invulnerable to a swift kick to the "charlie brown."
•The news had stunning, dramatic effects on NSBB posters.
•USSoccer climbed into a full bathtub while holding his plugged-in toaster.
•O_O reached new levels of anger for him, which is roughly 1/4 as angry as Gooney is on any given day.
•OleMiss converted to radical Islam; JR bought a Prius
•Treeman injected heroin into his forehead on Hendry's doorstep. He is now dead.
•Sethuel tried to do so as well, but the needle didn't penetrate the six-inch layer of vomit covering his face. A full recovery is excpected.
•ndistops bought a 6-pack and passed out 3/4 of the way through the first can. It should be noted it was a 6-pack of cream soda.
•The angels or dodgers will swoop in and compensate ARam fairly.
•One of Scott Brosius/Shane Andrews/Kevin Orie/Steve Buechele will be ARAM's replacement.
•Last year's team will soon look like a juggernaut compared to waht we're going to assemble.
•All hope is lost.

hope that helps.

So everyone overracted and a confused drunk got upset over nothing?

I was expecting this all along.

Chill guys.

I'll wait to inject my forehead with heorin on Hendry's doorsteptill there is a rumor Aramis signs elsewhere. Geezee guys.

Thats all I needed to hear, thanks.

I fully expect for him to be signed elsewhere in like 2 days

Careless · November 12, 2006

Be sure to sleep on your stomach tonight, Seth

eat me, fellow cubs fan

:lol:

But really, I was hoping for more drunken anti-revelry in this thread

Maybe I'm weird, but I still think they have a good chance.

USSoccer · November 12, 2006

5/$73m???

Pa-freakin-thetic. Like I said, act like a major market team for once, losers.

Illini Iceman · November 12, 2006

My sources say that the Cubs wanted a clause that fined ARam $1M every time a routine pop up bounced off his head to lose a game for the Cubs and he refused to agree!

USSoccer · November 12, 2006

My sources say that the Cubs wanted a clause that fined ARam $1M every time a routine pop up bounced off his head to lose a game for the Cubs and he refused to agree!

Funny. Remember that when we're watching Geoff Blum hustle his way to hitting .263 with 11 HR's next year for a 69-93 team.

wade · November 12, 2006

What a way to wake up Sunday morning.

Blow up the team. I'd rather wait 2 or 3 years for a shot at being good than watch the looming hodgepodge of a squad that will struggle to .500 in 2007.

YearofDaCubs · November 12, 2006

As I've said before keeping Hendry as GM was a HUGE mistake. ARam is as good as gone now and I really can't believe Hendry didn't make signing ARam a number 1 priority. If Hendry couldn't sign ARam to a contract how is he going to sign the other top free agents? He won't because he's always looking for a deal and we all know how much he loves to sign mediocre players to fill out the roster. Without ARam I don't see how the Cubs will be able to have any type of offense. At this point forget about winning this year because it's not going to happen. Trade Z, Lee and everyone else on the roster who has trade value and blow this thing up. This is just terrible.

Illini Iceman · November 12, 2006

My sources say that the Cubs wanted a clause that fined ARam $1M every time a routine pop up bounced off his head to lose a game for the Cubs and he refused to agree!

Funny. Remember that when we're watching Geoff Blum hustle his way to hitting .263 with 11 HR's next year for a 69-93 team.

OMG, you're right, now that I think about it I am afraid the Cubs could go 66 - 96 and finish with the worst record in the NL without ARAM! Oh wait...

I would like to have ARam back, but just like the hated Juan Pierre he did nothing when the Cubs needed him last year. His stats were built up in garbage time when the team was hopelessly out of contention. It would still be nice to sign him because it is one less hole to fill, but if not then take the money and try something new.

Go get Nomar or Ensberg and take the extra money to help upgrade other areas if you can't re-sign him. It's not the end of the world.

erik316wttn · November 12, 2006

I feel sick, guys. Really sick.

If Aram doesn't get re-signed I'm giving up on 2007. We have NO chance without him, unless by some miracle we trade for A-Rod.

Pinktermite · November 12, 2006

Yeah, Aram is great...but life goes on. Blow up the team? I think they've already imploded on their own. There's no need for more explosives.

Fox Sports: Ramirez SIGNS WITH CUBS!

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