Funniest heckles you have heard at baseball games

[Cubbie Swagger]

I was just reading an ESPN interview with Justin Grimm where he was asked the best heckle that he had received. He said some random guy yelled, "Quit hooking up with my sister!" It got me thinking about the best heckles that I have heard at games, and I thought it would be a decent idea for a thread.

 

So... let's hear 'em.

[WoodRules]

Not sure who it was directed at but "You even suck on my video game!".

[UMFan83]

To Wil Cordero:

 

"Hey Wil - Your slugging percentage is higher at home than it is at the park!"

[jersey cubs fan]

Yankee Stadium bleachers around 96/97 timeframe. Joe Carter is playing right field for toronto.

 

These were like $8 tickets.

 

A row in front of us somebody brought along some European fans for their first baseball game and spent the entire game explaining stuff. I don't remember the accent specifically but imagine something between a french or german person speaking english. Maybe one of our belgish friends.

 

Anyway, the game is going along and there's all the typical taunting, some show your "boobs" chants and regular bleacher shenanigans.

 

It got quiet somewhere late in the game and our Euro friend stood up and yelled to Carter in his accent, "Joe Carter, I have done stuff with your wife!" Carter very clearly heard it and doubled over laughing, along with everybody in the bleachers. It wasn't clever, but it sounded hilarious at the time.

 

Sidenote:

Within an inning or two there was a massive brawl between fans in the bleachers (nothing to do with team allegiances everything to do with long island/staten island meatheadedness) and it was around this time that they made some new beer drinking rules in the bleachers.

[Ding Dong Johnson]

It wasn't much of a "heckle", but my then 8 year old daughter yelled at Bill Hall at a AAA game. "Hey, do you know your name is half Ls?". He noticed and struck out, and laughed and waved on his way back to the dugout.

[Banedon]

Yankee Stadium bleachers around 96/97 timeframe. Joe Carter is playing right field for toronto.

 

These were like $8 tickets.

 

A row in front of us somebody brought along some European fans for their first baseball game and spent the entire game explaining stuff. I don't remember the accent specifically but imagine something between a french or german person speaking english. Maybe one of our belgish friends.

 

Anyway, the game is going along and there's all the typical taunting, some show your "boobs" chants and regular bleacher shenanigans.

 

It got quiet somewhere late in the game and our Euro friend stood up and yelled to Carter in his accent, "Joe Carter, I have done stuff with your wife!" Carter very clearly heard it and doubled over laughing, along with everybody in the bleachers. It wasn't clever, but it sounded hilarious at the time.

 

Sidenote:

Within an inning or two there was a massive brawl between fans in the bleachers (nothing to do with team allegiances everything to do with long island/staten island meatheadedness) and it was around this time that they made some new beer drinking rules in the bleachers.

 

In my imagination, it was Bronson Pinchot doing the heckling.

[CubinNY]

When the Pirates were good (Bonds era) I was sitting in the bleachers and someone called Andy VanSlyke a butt pirate. I got nothing.

 

At a Yankees game in 97 I was sitting in the RF bleachers and I have a Kalamazoo shirt on. Some knucklehead yelled, "only [expletive] come from Kalamazoo". I said, "maybe so, but you just called Jeter a [expletive]." The look on his face was priceless. Later he came back to me an said he was sorry. I was pretty wasted by that time and made the mistake of telling him no hard feelings, but you are still an ass-hole." During the singing of YMCA a gang of about 15 dudes surrounded me and my friends and sung the Y R U gay version of the song. Lesson learned, be nice to gangs of ass-holes.

[OleMissCub]

Early in the season when a batter still had a .000 average, someone yelled "hey! if you strike out it won't hurt your average!"

[Sammy Sofa]

My mom apologized to Ryan Church because my brother and I were apparently being too hard on him with our heckling from the empty RF bleachers at RFK.

[Clem Fandango]

My roommate and his friend heckled Shane Victorino with mom jokes when he was on the Phillies extensively with insults that made no sense so much that it got a chuckle out of him apparently. Things like "Your mom burned the meatloaf!" and "Your mom wears a coconut bra!"

 

Also, this is the best player reaction to heckling I've seen:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTGnh0rcQsc

[NOLA]

I sat in the bleachers back when Neon Deion was playing OF with the Reds and soon after being "born again". One guy next to me starts calling out to him the first 3 innings, mostly "Papa, why don't you ever call me?" type stuff. After booting a lazy fly all, Deion turns around to flip off the bleachers and screams at the guy before he even fields the ball against the ivy.

 

Meh, not really that funny, but interesting how a guy who had already accomplished so much lets some moron get under his skin so easily.

[Transmogrified Tiger]

It wasn't much of a "heckle", but my then 8 year old daughter yelled at Bill Hall at a AAA game. "Hey, do you know your name is half Ls?". He noticed and struck out, and laughed and waved on his way back to the dugout.

 

That is terrific.

 

I've not really heard any great heckles myself, but my favorite story is fans in the Wrigley bleachers giving Gregg Jefferies a hard time about having the worst possible fielding score in Strat-O-Matic, "You're a 5 Jefferies!" http://espn.go.com/magazine/wulf_20020213.html

[Sammy Sofa]

The only thing I tend to yell out is "YOU'RE A MEDIUM TALENT." It's what Bill Murray said to Chevy Chase way back in the day, and seems like a great way to plant something that gnaws in the back of their mind, even if just briefly.

[CubinNY]

I sat in the bleachers back when Neon Deion was playing OF with the Reds and soon after being "born again". One guy next to me starts calling out to him the first 3 innings, mostly "Papa, why don't you ever call me?" type stuff. After booting a lazy fly all, Deion turns around to flip off the bleachers and screams at the guy before he even fields the ball against the ivy.

 

Meh, not really that funny, but interesting how a guy who had already accomplished so much lets some moron get under his skin so easily.

I've seen some amazing stuff at baseball games, for example I saw Barry Bonds hit a broken bat line drive home run down the RF line at Joe Robby/Blockbuster/Whatever Stadium. But the most amazing thing I've seen is Sanders throw a ball completely out of Wrigley from just behind second base.

[SouthSideRyan]

Cubs-Yankees game 3-4 years ago, I was down the LF line, and a Yankee fan in the bleachers held up a sign for about 2/3 of the game telling Jeter it was her 25th(Some number) birthday, taunting most of the sparse crowd around her with it. I yelled out "I hope it's your last birthday."

[Derwood]

Cubs-Yankees game 3-4 years ago, I was down the LF line, and a Yankee fan in the bleachers held up a sign for about 2/3 of the game telling Jeter it was her 25th(Some number) birthday, taunting most of the sparse crowd around her with it. I yelled out "I hope it's your last birthday."

 

How did she hear you all the way from your luxury suite?

[Bobson Dugnutt]

Cubs-Marlins in 2005. Best seats I've ever had at a professional sporting event. 2 rows off the field right by the Marlins on-deck circle. For whatever reason, the group of guys in front of us zeroed in on Paul Lo Duca for the entire game, and were just relentless. Even when other Marlins players were on deck, these dudes were heckling them about Paul Lo Duca. A good chunk of the jokes were about his height. The one that sticks in my memory is when Lo Duca was taking some hacks in the on-deck circle, one of the guys shouts "Hey Paul, stand up!" So simple, but I couldn't stop laughing. Most of the Marlins players, including Lo Duca, acknowledged these guys and were good sports about it. Their focus on the target was impressive.

 

Since then, I've had it in my head that Lo Duca is like 5-4 or something. I was shocked to look it up just now and learn that he is actually 5-10.

[Andy]

I have a few, none exceptionally great. One time against Houston, in 2009, a bunch of us in the bleachers gave Carlos Lee a hard time, and at one point (after he'd hit a dong) someone yelled that he was on steroids. Lee turned around, mimed a syringe into his arm, and said "Shh." I got a kick out of it and found it harder to hate him after that.

 

In April 2012, we went to a game against Milwaukee soon after the Ryan Braun herpes stuff made the rounds, and although we were way too far away to yell anything, one of my friends got a big "S-T-D" chant going, which I loved.

 

I wasn't at this game, but my friends once gave Ryan Freel some crap against Cincinnati in 2004, and when he said something to the effect of "you're the Cubs, you suck", they yelled back "Look at the flags, Freel, you're in last place!"

[Derwood]

It's more fun to heckle the guys who'll heckle you back. The thin-skinned guys who get mad about it are boring. My one and only game in the bleachers (a Mark Prior start vs. the Marlins) saw a terrific set of exchanges between the bleacher fans and Brad Penny, who was shagging fly balls during BP. He could give it back as good as he got it

[Ding Dong Johnson]

Mikie Mahtook was a lot of fun at the Knights/Bulls game I went to last month. He took plenty of horsefeathers from the crowd, and he gave plenty back with a smile. It helped his case that he was getting all sorts of balls thrown out to him by coaches and whatnot so he could give them to kids in the stands.

[davell]

Basketball game, but I sat behind a guy in Charlotte that kept screaming stuff at AC Green....."Hey AC, can you teach my kid about the birds and the bees?" "AC, have you been given the talk yet?" " AC, are you on good terms with your weiner?" And many more. Worthy cracked up while AC was on the line.

[ConstableRabbit]

I typically look up the high schools and home towns of rookie OFs then yell about how much they suck. Surprisingly effective at getting their attention.

[ConstableRabbit]

I have a few, none exceptionally great. One time against Houston, in 2009, a bunch of us in the bleachers gave Carlos Lee a hard time, and at one point (after he'd hit a dong) someone yelled that he was on steroids. Lee turned around, mimed a syringe into his arm, and said "Shh." I got a kick out of it and found it harder to hate him after that.

 

In April 2012, we went to a game against Milwaukee soon after the Ryan Braun herpes stuff made the rounds, and although we were way too far away to yell anything, one of my friends got a big "S-T-D" chant going, which I loved.

 

I wasn't at this game, but my friends once gave Ryan Freel some crap against Cincinnati in 2004, and when he said something to the effect of "you're the Cubs, you suck", they yelled back "Look at the flags, Freel, you're in last place!"

Lee was one of the best at joking with opposing fans. Loved it.

[hwmudgett]

A friend of mine went to a Yankees-Mets game at Yankee Stadium and sat in LF seats near a couple of guys that had an irrational hatred for Moises Alou, who happened to be playing LF that day.

 

They were giving it to him all game, but they elicited a smirk and quick glance from Alou when one of them yelled

 

"Hey Moises, your mom just called, she told me to tell you....

 

BOOOOOOOOOO!"

[TruffleShuffle]

it's not really heckling, but i was at a phillies game when charlie hayes (a notoriously terrible third baseman for the phillies who was having an even more disastrous night than normal) made something like 4 errors in the first half of the game. some opposing batter hit a really weak dribbling foul ball down the line that he gloved successfully, and he got a massive derisive cheer from the whole crowd.