8/16 Brew Crew (Garza) @ Cubs (Cahill) 12:20PM CT WGN

[beantowncubfan]

That's right, that Matt Garza and his Milwaukee teammates escape the madness in Milwaukee to come to Chicago and meet the wrath of Trevor Cahill.

 

The cubs are indifferent about their recent series split with the Cards. Seriously, who cares about those douches. We have work to do easing into the playoffs...why else would be laughing at the league by starting the likes of Trevor Cahill?

 

In any case, lets all ignore our respective responsibilities at work and admire the dongs as we dispatch of ex-Cub and still soul patch rocking Matt Garza. For Matt's sake, lets post pics of dudes with awesome facial hair.

 

[Ding Dong Johnson]

http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/3/3a/YakovSmirnoff.jpg

[Sammy Sofa]

[Banedon]

http://i.imgur.com/6doVpYT.gif

[jersey cubs fan]

http://cdn.funnyisms.com/16a7ffd6-cead-4ea1-a7fa-2aa6cd50b89a.jpg

[cl smooth]

[Derwood]

http://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/730195/85105281.jpg

 

Our new mascot

[David]

how the hell did you have all those dudes' pictures on hand to make that

 

i think the only one of those pics i've seen before is roast's...maybe vance.

[Thed Hoyerstein]

http://www.cubsinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/jake-arrieta-mlb-chicago-cubs-detroit-tigers1-850x560.jpg

[Bull]

how the hell did you have all those dudes' pictures on hand to make that

 

i think the only one of those pics i've seen before is roast's...maybe vance.

 

Was roast the guy that got his face destroyed? You should use that pic.

[Derwood]

how the hell did you have all those dudes' pictures on hand to make that

 

i think the only one of those pics i've seen before is roast's...maybe vance.

 

they're all internet famous

[Banedon]

Fowler CF

Bryant 3B

Rizzo 1B

Zobrist 2B

Russell 2B

Coghlan LF

Heyward RF

Montero C

Cahill P

[Sammy Sofa]

Zobrist is the most boring cleanup hitter of all time. Me want dongmonster.

[Omar]

Brewers v. Cahill

Name               PA AB H 2B 3B HR RBI BB SO   BA  OBP  SLG   OPS SH SF IBB HBP GDP missG
Kirk Nieuwenhuis    7  7 0  0  0  0   0  0  0 .000 .000 .000  .000  0  0   0   0         0
Ryan Braun          4  4 1  1  0  0   2  0  1 .250 .250 .500  .750  0  0   0   0         0
Martin Maldonado    4  3 1  0  0  0   0  1  1 .333 .500 .333  .833  0  0   0   0         0
Hernan Perez        4  4 2  0  0  0   1  0  1 .500 .500 .500 1.000  0  0   0   0         0
Chris Carter        2  2 0  0  0  0   0  0  1 .000 .000 .000  .000  0  0   0   0         1
Matt Garza          2  2 0  0  0  0   0  0  1 .000 .000 .000  .000  0  0   0   0         0
Jonathan Villar     2  2 0  0  0  0   0  0  1 .000 .000 .000  .000  0  0   0   0         0
Chase Anderson      1  1 0  0  0  0   0  0  0 .000 .000 .000  .000  0  0   0   0         0
Ramon Flores        1  0 0  0  0  0   0  1       0           1.000  0  0   1   0         0
Scooter Gennett     1  1 0  0  0  0   0  0  0 .000 .000 .000  .000  0  0   0   0         0
Total              28 26 4  1  0  0   3  2  6 .154 .214 .192  .407  0  0   1   0         1
Has not faced: Orlando Arcia, Keon Broxton, Jake Elmore, Manny Pina and Andy Wilkins & Has not faced pitchers: Michael Blazek, Blaine Boyer, Zach Davies, Corey Knebel, Jhan Marinez, Jimmy Nelson, Wily Peralta, Rob Scahill, Tyler Thornburg and Carlos Torres

 

Cubs v. Garza

Name               PA  AB  H 2B 3B HR RBI BB SO   BA  OBP   SLG   OPS SH SF IBB HBP GDP missG
Miguel Montero     24  21  8  1  0  1   3  3  3 .381 .458  .571 1.030  0  0   0   0         0
Chris Coghlan      19  17  5  3  1  0   0  1  2 .294 .333  .588  .922  1  0   0   0         1
Jason Heyward      19  18  3  0  0  2   5  0  4 .167 .158  .500  .658  0  1   0   0         0
Dexter Fowler      15  11  2  1  0  0   0  4  4 .182 .400  .273  .673  0  0   0   0         0
Anthony Rizzo      15  15  4  0  0  1   3  0  2 .267 .267  .467  .733  0  0   0   0         0
Jorge Soler        11  11  3  1  0  0   2  0  3 .273 .273  .364  .636  0  0   0   0         0
Kris Bryant         9   7  1  0  0  1   1  1  3 .143 .333  .571  .905  0  0   0   1         0
Kyle Hendricks      7   7  0  0  0  0   0  0  6 .000 .000  .000  .000  0  0   0   0         0
Addison Russell     6   5  1  0  0  0   1  1  1 .200 .333  .200  .533  0  0   0   0         0
Ben Zobrist         6   5  3  0  0  1   1  1  0 .600 .667 1.200 1.867  0  0   0   0         0
Javier Baez         2   2  1  1  0  0   0  0  0 .500 .500 1.000 1.500  0  0   0   0         0
Jason Hammel        2   1  0  0  0  0   0  0  0 .000 .000  .000  .000  1  0   0   0         0
John Lackey         2   2  0  0  0  0   0  0  2 .000 .000  .000  .000  0  0   0   0         0
Total             137 122 31  7  1  6  16 11 30 .254 .319  .475  .794  2  1   0   1         1
Has not faced: Willson Contreras, David Ross and Matt Szczur & Has not faced pitchers: Jake Arrieta, Aroldis Chapman, Carl Edwards, Justin Grimm, Jon Lester, Mike Montgomery, Hector Rondon, Joe Smith and Travis Wood

[Banedon]

Zobrist is the most boring cleanup hitter of all time. Me want dongmonster.

 

I'm disappointed anytime there's no Baez, regardless of matchups.

[Thed Hoyerstein]

Fowler CF

Bryant 3B

Rizzo 1B

Zobrist 2B

Russell 2B

Coghlan LF

Heyward RF

Montero C

Cahill P

 

Maddon is so innovative that he's skipping a SS, I like it

[Banedon]

Fowler CF

Bryant 3B

Rizzo 1B

Zobrist 2B

Russell 2B

Coghlan LF

Heyward RF

Montero C

Cahill P

 

Maddon is so innovative that he's skipping a SS, I like it

 

Whoops, yeah I retyped it from a tweet cuz it was easier than trying to paste on my phone. Or so I thought.

[Omar]

I was skeptical of Cahill starting, but then I saw this hot pile of garbage:

[UMFan83]

I was skeptical of Cahill starting, but then I saw this hot pile of garbage:

 

What do you mean, 2 huge Cub killers in that lineup in Villar and Nieuwenhius

[Omar]

Combined 0/9 against Cy Cahill

[Cubswin11]

Zobrist is the most boring cleanup hitter of all time. Me want dongmonster.

 

I'm disappointed anytime there's no Baez, regardless of matchups.

He should be starting against very few RHP, to be honest

[JonJayCutler]

Happy Fat Jay Day!

 

http://img.bleacherreport.net/img/images/photos/001/630/947/140888508_crop_north.jpg?w=630&h=420&q=75

[UMFan83]

Oh God Pat Hughes off today. I think I'll just follow on Gameday

[Omar]

[UMFan83]

So if Cahill is starting game 1, what is the roster move that was made? As I understand it, the 26th man can only be made available for the 2nd game of a DH.