7/9 Cubs (Beeler) at Reds (Simon), 6:10 p.m. CDT WGN

[Hairyducked Idiot]

Alright guys, welcome to my game thread. We haven't won in one of my game threads yet this year, and we're terrible right now, but nonetheless I have a good feeling about this. Hot takes incoming:

 

 

Pitching for the Cubs is Dallas Beeler, who sucks but is in the process of doing that annoying thing where some fringe-average AAA guy has a not-terrible callup and suddenly half the fanbase is on his jock.

 

Alfredo Simon goes for the Reds, and here we have found the evil wizard who is stealing all of Edwin Jackson's peripheral>ERA conversion mojo.

 

5.49 K/9, 2.13 BB/9, 1.06 HR/9, 8.5% swinging strikes, 48% ground balls ... all pretty bad and boring and yet ... 2.48 ERA.

 

He has been doing this for three years totalling 250 innings, in which he has accrued 1.0 fWAR but 4.1 bWAR. I'm sure he'll do it again to the Cubs.

 

The whole Reds team is a collection of crummy players playing over their heads. The only good players on the Reds are Joey Votto and Aroldis Chapman, and Votto is slipping fast. Everyone else is some variation of stupid and lucky. The only good thing about their existence is that they are hanging around in mediocrity getting their fanbase's hopes up to be crushed by the Brewers and Pirates and Cardinals.

 

Arismendy Alcantara is being called up for this game for the Cubs, for a two-day callup while Darwin Barney is on paternity leave, which is apparently a thing that can happen. This seems like good news, but it is not, for two reasons:

 

1) We all know he's going to ride the bench for those two days and it's going to drive us mad.

2) He's BABIPing about like .600 in AAA and the transition to MLB is going to destroy him so he better be really good defensively.

 

Alright, here we go. Go Cobs. One more year of this crap before we own for a decade.

 

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lpzbojfGTU1qjvn2d.gif

Edited July 9, 2014 by Hairyducked Idiot

[Guest]

You get Alcantara. Don't blow it

[coldsteel]

Soon, the pitiful cubs fans' hopes to win this game shall be crushed, and we shall get another mighty teenager to add to our ranks

 

http://i.minus.com/ih7ldZhTWS6YR.gif

[Clem Fandango]

Soon, the pitiful cubs fans' hopes to win this game shall be crushed, and we shall get another mighty teenager to add to our ranks

 

http://i.minus.com/ih7ldZhTWS6YR.gif

 

We get it, you like that gif.

 

http://i.imgur.com/xCeCGKF.gif

[Tangled Up in Plaid]

Soon, the pitiful cubs fans' hopes to win this game shall be crushed, and we shall get another mighty teenager to add to our ranks

 

http://i.minus.com/ih7ldZhTWS6YR.gif

jesus christ, get a new schtick.

[Hairyducked Idiot]

You know what guys? This is my game thread and as a connoisseur of jokes that only I find funny being repeated to the point of everyone else's annoyance, I'm gonna allow it.

 

Continue, coldsteel

[Clem Fandango]

It appears Kyle has fallen prey to my games

 

http://i.minus.com/ih7ldZhTWS6YR.gif

[coldsteel]

Sorry Kyle! Well... maybe can steer the thread back to its rightful serious baseball discussion. Arismendy will hopefully clobber Simon. Beeler will hopefully be as good as last time. And losing 6 in a row would be a bit too monotonous but I guess it doesn't matter too much.

[DiamondMind]

http://i.minus.com/ih7ldZhTWS6YR.gif

 

http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/sick-gif.gif

[Ding Dong Johnson]

http://37.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lzyut9CZhb1qeg7cro1_500.gif

[davell]

Any chance Big Al works for Alcantara? It'd be an excuse for an Al Bundy themed thread anyway.....

[SouthSideRyan]

Or a Peoria strip club themed thread

[DiamondMind]

Please don't talk about Peoria

[DiamondMind]

Random question, what do you guys think of 670?

[treebird]

not enough miley

[Guest]

Or a Peoria strip club themed thread

 

http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b181/Aboab/c52ded5a.jpg

[DiamondMind]

not enough miley

 

I listen to it like 4-6 hours a day, driving for work. Make of that what you will. There's really no other option though. Sometimes I can't stand it, sometimes I love it - was just curious what other people thought and figured I'd just ask here.

[DiamondMind]

http://i.imgur.com/pOOA5VB.jpg?2

[SouthSideRyan]

I like Miley

[Guest]

i was hoping today was hendricks day...damnit

[Irrelevant Dude]

i was hoping today was hendricks day...damnit

I thought that had already been announced. What happened?

[treebird]

not enough miley

 

I listen to it like 4-6 hours a day, driving for work. Make of that what you will. There's really no other option though. Sometimes I can't stand it, sometimes I love it - was just curious what other people thought and figured I'd just ask here.

 

that is a lot of miley

[Guest]

i was hoping today was hendricks day...damnit

I thought that had already been announced. What happened?

 

never said it hadn't been

 

guess it's tomorrow

[DiamondMind]

96.5 is insufferable though :\

[weis21]

i was hoping today was hendricks day...damnit

I thought that had already been announced. What happened?

 

never said it hadn't been

 

guess it's tomorrow

Yeah, I think it was always supposed to be Thursday.