The Real Trades of Jim Hendry

[roadtotheshow]

'2002

 

Cubs get:

Matt Clement

Antonio Alfonseca

Marlins Championship Ring

 

Marlins get:

Julian Tavarez

Dontrelle Willis

Jose Cueto

Ryan Jorgensen

 

2003

 

Cubs get:

Eric Karros

Mark Grudzielanek

New Driver

 

Dodgers get:

Todd Hundley

Chad Hermansen

 

Cubs get:

Kenny Lofton

Aramis Ramirez

 

Pirates get:

Jose Hernandez

Bobby Hill

Matt Bruback

2004

 

Cubs get:

Derrek Lee

Marlins Fans- which is why wrigley is sold out every game and florida cant fill 50 seats

The Rights to Fort Meyers Beach

 

Marlins get:

Hee Seop Choi

Mike Nannini

 

Cubs get:

Michael Barrett

Golf Balls

Ricky Hendersons Shoes and Jersey

First Look at all of Jose Canseco's Books

 

A's get:

Damian Miller

Cash

 

Cubs get:

Andy Pratt

Richard Lewis

Bobby Cox's Jock Strap

Front Row Seats at Hank Aaron's Funeral

 

 

Braves get:

Juan Cruz

Steve Smyth

 

Cubs get:

Nomar Garciaparra

Matt Murton

Curt Shillings Bloody Sock

A piece of the Metrodome Turf- so Jim can pratice putting in his back yard

 

Red Sox get:

Orlando Cabrera

Doug Mientkiewicz

Ivy

 

Expos get:

Francis Beltran (f/ Cubs)

Brendan Harris (f/ Cubs)

Alex Gonzalez (f/ Cubs)

Jim's Old Irons

 

Twins get:

Justin Jones (f/ Cubs)

Jim's Hole and One Ball

 

2005

 

Cubs get:

Jerry Hairston, Jr

Mike Fontenot

Mine That Bird

Ripkens 3000th Hit Ball

 

Orioles get:

Sammy Sosa

Steriods

 

Cubs get:

Roberto Novoa

Dave Dombroski's High School Diploma

Jim Lelland's Will

 

Tigers get:

Kyle Farnsworth

Ronny Woo Woo

 

2006

 

Cubs get:

Juan Pierre

Ping Irons

 

Marlins get:

Ricky Nolasco

Renyel Pinto

Sergio Mitre

 

Cubs get:

Jose Ceda

Kevin Tower's Golf Bag

5000 dollar gift card to Golfsmith

 

Padres get:

Todd Walker

 

Cubs get:

Cesar Izturis

Golf Lessons from Greg and a Free Round of Golf

 

Dodgers get:

Greg Maddux

 

2007

 

Cubs get:

Neal Cotts

Signed Ball by Hawk

Kenny Williams Brain-that one didnts hapen yet

 

White Sox get:

Carlos Vasquez

David Aardsma

 

Cubs get:

Cash

 

Reds get:

Josh Hamilton-picked up by rule 5 draft and imediately traded

 

Cubs get:

Rob Bowen

Kyler Burke

Tony Gwynn's HOF Plaque

 

Padres get:

Michael Barrett

cash

-

 

Cubs get:

Jason Kendall

Cash

3 and 5 Wood

 

A's get:

Rob Bowen

Jerry Blevins

 

-

 

Cubs get:

Steve Trachsel

Andy MacPhail's Underwear

 

Orioles get:

Scott Moore

Rocky Cherry

 

2008

 

Cubs Get:

Luis Vizcaino

Tour of Denver

 

Rockies Get:

Jason Marquis

 

Cubs Get:

Aaron Heilman

Griffey Jr.'s 1st and LAst HR Ball

 

Mariners Get:

Ronny Cedeno

Garret Olson

 

Cubs Get:

A Putter To be Named Later

 

Orioles Get:

Rich Hill

 

Cubs Get:

Archer

Gaub

Stevens

Unlimited Access to All Golf Courses in Ohio

 

Indians Get:

Mark Derosa

 

Jim has done well for himself

Edited June 30, 2009 by roadtotheshow

[Butterscup1679666578]

lol its funny because you put things in there like golf clubs that werent actually traded i get it

[Derwood]

pointless thread is pointless

[Tony Thomas]

Does anybody know who the candidates are for the PTBNL in the Rich Hill trade?

[Clem Fandango]

Are you implying that all of Jim Hendy's trades were good? This is the "Jim Hendry's Best Trades" thread and you listed virtually every single trade he's ever done.

 

Not gonna lie, I chuckled at the first joke about the Marlins Championship ring... then I realized this isn't a meaningful thread so much as it is a vehicle to promote your clichéd sense of humor

[sonicdethmonkey0]

The disgruntled and huddled masses of NSBB congregated in the Cubs Discussion board, the Transactions board, hoping -- nay, praying -- to the cruel baseball deities for some sort of answer to their infinite woe. How could this be? they wondered to themselves, as their beloved tribe floundered at three-and-one-half games out of first place. Has God himself forsaken us? Has he devoted His substantial power entirely to the procurement of sugared treats for Mr. Hendry? Is there any beacon of hope at the end of this tunnel, or should we be resigned to spending the rest of our wretched existence pining for a savior that shall never come? A streak of victories, a newfound arrival from a foreign land to turn our fortunes around? Thread after thread ushered in nothing but blackness, an all-encompassing void powerful enough to crush mens' souls. The masses bickered and fought with each other, attempting to uncover a rationale for the year's events, but alas, it was not within their collective capacities, not realizing that for a century, individuals met their demise searching for some sort of answer -- an unyielding, glorious truth -- that would serve to turn this era of misfortune around into a golden age, where victories rained down from the heavens, an age where a new dynasty would be ushered in to amend the seeming eons of despair.

 

Just then, a prophet emerged out of the void. roadtotheshow came unexpected, unannounced, unfathomably. It was the blackest time of all, less than a day removed from another crushing defeat at the hands of a hated neighboring enemy. To call their spirits low would be a gross exaggeration -- they were nonexistent, they lacked the physical capacity to have the thing known as "spirit." roadtotheshow looked at these pathetic, petty NSBB-ites, and gave them a gift -- the gift of levity. Without warning, with a few mighty keystrokes, he assailed Mr. Hendry for his inadequate transactions over the years, but oh, my loyal reader, the way in which he did it! In a deft comedic move, roadtotheshow added a series of falsehoods to the transactions which were so near and dear to the NSBB-ites' hearts. "Curt Schilling's bloody sock" the screen read, and for the first time in months, a feeling known to mortals as "joy" was experienced. Immediately, there was laughter, there were children conceived, shouting down the virtual alleys and roads, a clamoring for peace, a new belief in the very idea that had so tantalized these desperate parties for so long -- hope. There was hope. NSBB was saved - for now.

[JimSorgi]

I'm not sure I understand the point to this, unless you're just trying to show off your comedy skills.

[Roast]

Twins get:

Justin Jones (f/ Cubs)

Jim's Hole and One Ball

 

I can't help but think this is completely inappropriate...

[Brian]

I gave: a minute or so of my time.

 

I got: nothing.

 

 

that was fun.

[Tyrant]

Twins get:

Justin Jones (f/ Cubs)

Jim's Hole and One Ball

 

I can't help but think this is completely inappropriate...

 

I think he means "Hole-in-one ball."

[manbearcub]

The disgruntled and huddled masses of NSBB congregated in the Cubs Discussion board, the Transactions board, hoping -- nay, praying -- to the cruel baseball deities for some sort of answer to their infinite woe. How could this be? they wondered to themselves, as their beloved tribe floundered at three-and-one-half games out of first place. Has God himself forsaken us? Has he devoted His substantial power entirely to the procurement of sugared treats for Mr. Hendry? Is there any beacon of hope at the end of this tunnel, or should we be resigned to spending the rest of our wretched existence pining for a savior that shall never come? A streak of victories, a newfound arrival from a foreign land to turn our fortunes around? Thread after thread ushered in nothing but blackness, an all-encompassing void powerful enough to crush mens' souls. The masses bickered and fought with each other, attempting to uncover a rationale for the year's events, but alas, it was not within their collective capacities, not realizing that for a century, individuals met their demise searching for some sort of answer -- an unyielding, glorious truth -- that would serve to turn this era of misfortune around into a golden age, where victories rained down from the heavens, an age where a new dynasty would be ushered in to amend the seeming eons of despair.

 

Just then, a prophet emerged out of the void. roadtotheshow came unexpected, unannounced, unfathomably. It was the blackest time of all, less than a day removed from another crushing defeat at the hands of a hated neighboring enemy. To call their spirits low would be a gross exaggeration -- they were nonexistent, they lacked the physical capacity to have the thing known as "spirit." roadtotheshow looked at these pathetic, petty NSBB-ites, and gave them a gift -- the gift of levity. Without warning, with a few mighty keystrokes, he assailed Mr. Hendry for his inadequate transactions over the years, but oh, my loyal reader, the way in which he did it! In a deft comedic move, roadtotheshow added a series of falsehoods to the transactions which were so near and dear to the NSBB-ites' hearts. "Curt Schilling's bloody sock" the screen read, and for the first time in months, a feeling known to mortals as "joy" was experienced. Immediately, there was laughter, there were children conceived, shouting down the virtual alleys and roads, a clamoring for peace, a new belief in the very idea that had so tantalized these desperate parties for so long -- hope. There was hope. NSBB was saved - for now.

:-)) :-))

[Burtonbell]

I got to "Marlins Fans" and the stopped reading. Meh.

[JonJayCutler]

What was worse, the Pierre trade or DeRosa trade?

[Tyrant]

What was worse, the Pierre trade or DeRosa trade?

 

The Pierre trade, by a huge margin.

[Clem Fandango]

What was worse, the Pierre trade or DeRosa trade?

 

The Pierre trade, by a huge margin.

 

Totally. I mean you only have to pay for Ping golf clubs once. Getting access to every Ohio golf course at any time is a pretty sweet deal considering you never have to pay. Green fees can get expensive

[sonicdethmonkey0]

the pierre trade is the worst cubs trade of my lifetime (22.78 years old). someone correct me if i'm wrong.

[dew1679666265]

What was worse, the Pierre trade or DeRosa trade?

 

The Pierre trade, by a huge margin.

 

Yeah, it's not even particularly questionable. We lost three pretty good young pitchers (one of those very good - Nolasco) in the Pierre deal and got back a decent piece.

 

In the DeRo deal, we gained three decent, high-ceiling prospects for an aging, yet still productive second baseman.

[UMFan83]

You guys are jerks. Funny or not, the guy probably spent some time putting that together and got completely torn apart for it.

[Sosa21MVP]

I found it somewhat amusing.

[Arnold Layne]

Nice comprehensive Hendry bloop reel, OP. I enjoyed it.

[CubmanPi]

You guys are jerks. Funny or not, the guy probably spent some time putting that together and got completely torn apart for it.

He probably did spend some time on it. He also took away from whatever point he was trying to make by turning it into a humor column. Also, why do people keep forgetting that Kenny Lofton and Aramis Ramirez were only two of the three who came over in that trade?

[Hunter]

Why does everyone forget how the Josh Hamilton trade actually went down. We never really had Josh Hamilton. We were asked to pick him by the Reds in an already agreed upon deal.

[dew1679666265]

Why does everyone forget how the Josh Hamilton trade actually went down. We never really had Josh Hamilton. We were asked to pick him by the Reds in an already agreed upon deal.

 

This is correct. There was never a possibility of keeping him.

[dew1679666265]

Also, why do people keep forgetting that Kenny Lofton and Aramis Ramirez were only two of the three who came over in that trade?

 

Who was the third?

 

I thought the deal was just Aramis, Lofton and cash for Hernandez, Hill and Bruback.

[roadtotheshow]

Idc, the point was to make fun of Jim