Front Office Thread

[SouthSideRyan]

any time kyle is being positive about the cubs it's only so later on when something goes wrong he can feel bad about letting the team get his hopes up. he's the worst and everyone needs to stop pretending he's people

 

You're going to *love* me whenever we go out in the playoffs.

 

I'm setting up an emergency mod protocol for such a scenario.

 

Citizen's banning

[SouthSideRyan]

any time kyle is being positive about the cubs it's only so later on when something goes wrong he can feel bad about letting the team get his hopes up. he's the worst and everyone needs to stop pretending he's people

 

You're going to *love* me whenever we go out in the playoffs.

 

I'm setting up an emergency mod protocol for such a scenario.

 

I remember last time I compared us being excited about making the playoffs to my cat being excited when I bring home burgers. Then I spent an entire offseason telling everyone I was trying to be a Cardinals fan.

 

WHY ARE YOU REMINISCING ABOUT THIS

[Guest]

as far as self-loathing sad sack defeatist cub fan analogies go, the one about the cubs in the playoffs = cats when he brings home mcdonalds is pretty great, i have to say.

[Guest]

I know this isn't the positivity thread but what the hell are you people doing? It's almost festivus.

 

Anyways, I really don't mind the hints that we might not be players for the major free agents. This team needs pitching depth, preferably young. Trades and mid-tier signings are probably for the best.

Trades, mid-tier signing, and star for good measure.

 

They need to be 100 game winners from now on.

 

this is what i want.

 

we have all this surplus positional value that we threw 3 years away to get. now use it to become an unstoppable winning machine.

[imb]

the cubs making the playoffs is like moving to bumfuck, nowhere to work for a woman named katie pizza

[Hairyducked Idiot]

WHY ARE YOU REMINISCING ABOUT THIS

 

David's said several times something to the effect of "a-ha, this says so much about you" in recent days, but I'm going to let you in on the not-so-secret that really does explain everything: I find me hilarious, which is why it really doesn't bother me if nobody else does.

[SouthSideRyan]

I really don't understand how somebody could look at our current situation, and say nah, let's stay out of the David Price derby, and sign multiple Jason Hammels.

[Hairyducked Idiot]

the cubs making the playoffs is like moving to [expletive], nowhere to work for a woman named katie pizza

 

That was one of the best decisions I ever made, although granted that's not a high bar.

[Hairyducked Idiot]

I really don't understand how somebody could look at our current situation, and say nah, let's stay out of the David Price derby, and sign multiple Jason Hammels.

 

I kind of don't want 1/3rd of our payroll in 2017 tied up in a pair of 33-year-old pitchers.

[imb]

WHY ARE YOU REMINISCING ABOUT THIS

 

David's said several times something to the effect of "a-ha, this says so much about you" in recent days, but I'm going to let you in on the not-so-secret that really does explain everything: I find me hilarious, which is why it really doesn't bother me if nobody else does.

 

*tips fedora*

*spins and walks away*

*trips when sandals strap comes loose*

[Hairyducked Idiot]

*tips fedora*

*spins and walks away*

*trips when sandals strap comes loose*

 

*regains balance, pulls up cargo shorts worn too low because of gut*

[Guest]

i mean fucknig seriously

 

imagine our dong filled young lineup backed by a rotation that looks something like (just spitballing on ross)

 

arrieta, price, lester, ross, hendricks/hammel

 

how does that team even lose more than 2 games in a row at any point?

[Sammy Sofa]

 

Kyle is generally wrong

 

i'd say he's right more often than most and he has a lot of knowledge of baseball and the things he's talking about

 

even if he doesn't know stuff like what hand mike minor throws with or which one is paul blackburn and which is duane underwood.

 

Mojo would kindly request you stop making people up.

 

I seriously thought David somehow fucked up the phrase "what hand makes minor throws" because even something that nonsensical makes more sense than someone named Mike Minor existing.

 

Seeing as his three decent years were while the Cubs were in the wastes and that he plays for the [expletive] Braves, I stand by it.

[Guest]

I really don't understand how somebody could look at our current situation, and say nah, let's stay out of the David Price derby, and sign multiple Jason Hammels.

 

I kind of don't want 1/3rd of our payroll in 2017 tied up in a pair of 33-year-old pitchers.

 

depends what it's 1/3 of.

 

we're set up to be low payroll everywhere else. a huge chunk of payroll is automatically going to be whoever we sign as a free agent.

[ctcf]

WHY ARE YOU REMINISCING ABOUT THIS

 

David's said several times something to the effect of "a-ha, this says so much about you" in recent days, but I'm going to let you in on the not-so-secret that really does explain everything: I find me hilarious, which is why it really doesn't bother me if nobody else does.

 

Trust me, everyone could already tell.

[Guest]

 

Kyle is generally wrong

 

i'd say he's right more often than most and he has a lot of knowledge of baseball and the things he's talking about

 

even if he doesn't know stuff like what hand mike minor throws with or which one is paul blackburn and which is duane underwood.

 

Mojo would kindly request you stop making people up.

 

I seriously thought David somehow [expletive] up the phrase "what hand makes minor throws" because even something that nonsensical makes more sense than someone named Mike Minor existing.

 

Seeing as his three decent years were while the Cubs were in the wastes and that he plays for the [expletive] Braves, I stand by it.

 

this sequence of posts is amazing. i love yous guys.

[Hairyducked Idiot]

i mean [expletive] seriously

 

imagine our dong filled young lineup backed by a rotation that looks something like (just spitballing on ross)

 

arrieta, price, lester, ross, hendricks/hammel

 

how does that team even lose more than 2 games in a row at any point?

 

Arrieta and Hammel get hurt and suddenly you've got Clayton Richard and Travis Wood back in your rotation while the bullpen blows up.

[ctcf]

i mean [expletive] seriously

 

imagine our dong filled young lineup backed by a rotation that looks something like (just spitballing on ross)

 

arrieta, price, lester, ross, hendricks/hammel

 

how does that team even lose more than 2 games in a row at any point?

 

Go ask the Nationals and the Dodgers.

[Hairyducked Idiot]

I really don't understand how somebody could look at our current situation, and say nah, let's stay out of the David Price derby, and sign multiple Jason Hammels.

 

I kind of don't want 1/3rd of our payroll in 2017 tied up in a pair of 33-year-old pitchers.

 

depends what it's 1/3 of.

 

we're set up to be low payroll everywhere else. a huge chunk of payroll is automatically going to be whoever we sign as a free agent.

 

I think I'd rather do short-term deals on mid-level guys than blow it all on an old pitcher. Screw pitchers.

[Guest]

i mean [expletive] seriously

 

imagine our dong filled young lineup backed by a rotation that looks something like (just spitballing on ross)

 

arrieta, price, lester, ross, hendricks/hammel

 

how does that team even lose more than 2 games in a row at any point?

 

Go ask the Nationals and the Dodgers.

 

this is about the most extreme example you could use to display the importance of managers

[Guest]

i mean [expletive] seriously

 

imagine our dong filled young lineup backed by a rotation that looks something like (just spitballing on ross)

 

arrieta, price, lester, ross, hendricks/hammel

 

how does that team even lose more than 2 games in a row at any point?

 

Arrieta and Hammel get hurt and suddenly you've got Clayton Richard and Travis Wood back in your rotation while the bullpen blows up.

 

sure, but then at least you still have price and lester fronting it.

[SouthSideRyan]

I really don't understand how somebody could look at our current situation, and say nah, let's stay out of the David Price derby, and sign multiple Jason Hammels.

 

I kind of don't want 1/3rd of our payroll in 2017 tied up in a pair of 33-year-old pitchers.

 

I don't want to be pondering a bullpen game in the 2016 playoffs.

[Hairyducked Idiot]

i mean [expletive] seriously

 

imagine our dong filled young lineup backed by a rotation that looks something like (just spitballing on ross)

 

arrieta, price, lester, ross, hendricks/hammel

 

how does that team even lose more than 2 games in a row at any point?

 

Arrieta and Hammel get hurt and suddenly you've got Clayton Richard and Travis Wood back in your rotation while the bullpen blows up.

 

sure, but then at least you still have price and lester fronting it.

 

Is Price/Lester/Ross/crap/crap better than Lester/Ross/decent/decent/decent and a better bullpen?

 

Enough better to justify a massive resource expenditure on a g-d pitcher?

[Hairyducked Idiot]

I really don't understand how somebody could look at our current situation, and say nah, let's stay out of the David Price derby, and sign multiple Jason Hammels.

 

I kind of don't want 1/3rd of our payroll in 2017 tied up in a pair of 33-year-old pitchers.

 

I don't want to be pondering a bullpen game in the 2016 playoffs.

 

Exactly. So let's fix the pitching depth this offseason.

[SouthSideRyan]

I really don't understand how somebody could look at our current situation, and say nah, let's stay out of the David Price derby, and sign multiple Jason Hammels.

 

I kind of don't want 1/3rd of our payroll in 2017 tied up in a pair of 33-year-old pitchers.

 

I don't want to be pondering a bullpen game in the 2016 playoffs.

 

Exactly. So let's fix the pitching depth this offseason.

 

Yes, more Jason Hammels, who we are pondering skipping for a bullpen game.