Sammy Sofa
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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa
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Dracula, Blacula and Son of Kong.
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He was totally trying to do some blow off of some big ol' Brazilian butts. Let's remember who we're talking about here.
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Tried to buy drugs and/or hookers and got ripped off or "lost" his wallet and made up a story that sounds like he watched Boondock Saints too much like the douchebro he is. His whole bit about the thief (either THE thief, or one of several, depending on who is telling the story, natch) putting a gun to his head and cocking it (and him going, "whatever") is such a hilariously and obviously made up detail.
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In other words... http://i.imgur.com/ZGsZX.gif
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His sleek, blubbery coat would dry out.
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Also: you really should change your name to "Heyward Fan." We need to do everything we can to salvage him. -
I thought the same thing. "When the horsefeathers did Jake change his number?"
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Uhmmmm, says the guy acting like the Goose Gossage of PED awesomeness. And everything fun is the opium of the masses to you. The sooner you accept our new, super fast Jamaican overlords and quit pining for Lance Armstrong to lower taxes, brutalize criminals and rule you like a king, the better.
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I dont know what to tell you; the only thing I care about less than whether an athlete is using PED's or not is whether track or bicycling is more popular. And I was one of the cool kids that thought Armstrong seemed like an obnoxious dick when he "was the most inspirational story ever." He was a hyper-competitive, mildly sociopathic ass loathed by his teammates and everyone else in the sport, and not in a good way like prime Jordan or Tiger. Bolt is a likable guy clearly having a blast and he provides bite-sized moments of amazingness and then he goes away and I don't have to see his stupid bracelets and books and everything else like stupid Armstrong. Just admit that you didnt know where to get those bracelets and felt left out at first, and then you saw [expletive] wearing them and you were like "yep, i knew those things were for [expletive]." You were totally the shattered "IT'S STILL REAL TO ME, DAMMIT"-guy of Lance Armstrong-ing, weren't you?
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Sulley's all about valiant Latin American and Caribbean struggles against the yoke of capitalist imperialism, except when it comes to shiny medals for doing things fast.
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http://67.media.tumblr.com/a4218e0e58cac196093f59636cfb5cd5/tumblr_nim815j1oT1rm4mpho1_500.png
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Granted, I haven't watched a ton of Olympics in the past, but this one seems be to pretty strikingly asstastic in terms of all of the butts on display. It's kinda hilarious to look up at the dozen or so huge monitors and TV's on the walls in my office and just seeing closeups of amazing hinders in HD pretty much all day.
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HEY, THREAD STARTER GUY: http://i.giphy.com/14lM8eUkH58v3q.gif
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Tim's gotta be a good half a bottle to the wind at this point. half? You're right; that's WAY too much.
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What? Tim's gotta be a good half a bottle to the wind at this point.
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Hammel continues to impress.
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Hell yeah.
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Everyone did. Schwarber not being hobbled would make a big difference. Add him and they're almost certainly in the top 5.
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Bigger shout out to the dude inexplicably wearing an '89 Batman t-shirt.
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Rizzo is the best.
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Granted, this was made for the Lions, but let's bask in the Bears' shittiness, too: http://media.freep.com/uploads/digital/lions_playoff_wins.jpg
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You need to start the thread. FIX IT.
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Jonathan Papelbon outright released
Sammy Sofa replied to Little Slide Rooter's topic in Chicago Cubs Talk
I'm 98% sure its going to be here. I really hope not, but if it is, we might as well start calling our bullpen the legion of doom http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01120/university-challen_1120947c.jpg -
I'm still confused; the other guy was listed ahead of ct. He didn't get skipped. Delete this nonsense.
