JudasIscariotTheBird

While at the UC last week I noticed they now have Giordanos, by far the worst of the deep dish Chicago chains They have also invaded downtown Denver.

The fans are definitely.....something. Several years ago, I was in Vegas for my friend's bachelor party. We were at some casino (the Aria maybe?) for dinner, and on our way to the restaurant, there was a UFC fighter on the casino floor taking photos with tourists/fans. We saw the guy from the back, and he was sweaty and had clearly just fought. I didn't think much of it until he turned around and half of his face was swollen shut and there was a ton of cotton shoved up his nose to staunch the bleeding. Why do pretty co-eds in cocktail dresses want their photo taken with a guy who was just beaten to a pulp? Because you should have seen the other guy! I also spent age 8 to age 22 wrestling at a pretty high level, and I've done some jiu jitsu and helped some local fighters with wrestling in their camps, so I enjoy the a lot of the technical aspects of things. I mean, I'm a big fan of a fighter that is considered the most boring fighter around in Ben Askren. Just about any one-on-one sport is something I'm a big fan of. I could actually do without the brutal KOs most of the time, but I'm definitely not a normal fan. I've been to some local fights and the fans were...horrid. This UFC event actually was MUCH better behaved than what I've seen before. There was even a multiracial gay couple sitting right in front of me, and no one tried to fight them, or even insulted them! Inspiring stuff!

I can tell that most everyone here writes off MMA/UFC as redneck fodder, and they might be right, but I can't help myself. I went to my first UFC fight which was here in Denver and it was pretty great and cool and stuff. It ended with possibly the coolest KO ever with 1 second left in a 5 round fight. [bbvideo=560,315]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crwHiCZjUMI[/bbvideo]

Sure. I also think that Machado would be an excellent super sub. A billionaire's Jose Hernandez.

Wonder who Jason Heyward is signing with this off-season. Yeah that’s not the point though. Players who already have leverage (due to age positional scarcity or whatever) will always ask for opt outs. Once one team is willing to kick in, they all have to. You might as well be complaining about the per year dollar figure. “But why do we have to pay him $30 million?????” Because he asked for it and he could get it from someone else if not us. If you don’t want to do it, don’t, but you aren’t getting the player. Consider the absurdity of wanting Harper but griping about his opt outs. It’s the price of doing business baby Does this mean there needs to be an opt-out cap, just like there are salary caps?

My bad. I thought the 1 year contract was a free agent contract. Lame. (I think there is a chance they non-tender him, tho...unlike Bryant)

I was unaware he was Louis CK. It's the other way around.

In this scenario do we not resign Seal Boy but he just kinda hangs out around the ballpark and makes the team that way?

He's a tumbling, tumbling [expletive]. Hard pass.

Eh, giving a 34 year old pitcher $20 million isn’t necessary for an FU offseason. I’m a Hamels fan but the best window for him on the Cubs was under the non-option years of that 2012 extension thanks to the [expletive] salary cap If they’re having to jump through crazy hoops to bring back a 34 year old pitcher they apparently really want I’m worried about how much money they really have to spend. That being said. There has to be some leverage with the Rangers here if they’re on the hook for the $6 million buyout. Tell them instead of just eating $6 million in cash they can take back a Kintzler and we’ll give them Zack Short and a pitching prospect or some horsefeathers for a PTBNL Seriously. I can see Theo sitting in a shadowy booth in Arlington smoking a cigar and loudly musing, as soon as the Rangers' GM enters the lounge, "It would be a REAL shame if we didn't have the cap space to pick up Cole's option. hahahahaHAHAHAHA!!!!"

Just so long as Chris Gimenez isn't pals with Bryce.

538's obsession with ELO is amazing to me. For baseball it could make sense, if it wasn't so random and dependant on pitching match ups. That they use it for football almost exclusively with 16 game seasons where the results of rosters that no longer exist greatly effect future ELO ratings...gross. Pythag and WAR are a much better indicator of talent levels.

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The problem with baseball today is that managers do not manage the 4th inning with the 18th inning in mind. Xactly. Much more efficient to lose by 3 in regulation than giving yourself a better chance but losing in 18.

I watched some Critic episodes like 4 years ago and I was stunned at how unfunny it was...apart from Duke, who is still hillarious.

I think I was the only one hating on Jon Lovitz, and I made no comment on Jackass, so not sure which world you are referring to.

...which brings us back to Jon Lovitz. http://jewornotjew.com/img/people/h/hanukkah_harry.jpg Half of Jon's shtick is that he's a living, breathing (and coincidentally very conservative, which is my main beef) Jewish stereotype. So Jon "I'm not funny" Lovitz is ...look, this is just the dumbest argument I've had on this site. Take up Tom Cruise's depiction of a Jewish stereotype with Ben Stiller and some guy named Etan Cohan. They wrote the screenplay. The only thing Tom added was fat hands and the silly dance routine. If you just want to blanket every depiction of a white guy playing a black guy as racist I can't stop you. Blackface obviously has a loaded history, but Tropic Thunder was wholely conscious of what it was doing, and it wasn't minstrel in its depiction. I think you are missing the forrest for the trees if you generalize that extremely.

...which brings us back to Jon Lovitz.

Tropic Thunder is and was hillarious. I will not budge from that one iota.

I want to take this moment to point out that Jon Lovitz's star has aged less gracefully than Downey's. Arguing about avatars is a bit silly, but that's not at all the point Sammy was making. The point I'm making is I hate Mojo's avatar more than Tom's. Infinitely so. Most everything we argue about here is completely silly, for the record.