treebird

groundhog day toaster in bath suicide gif

this is an extremely reductive line of thinking, but it’s the one i’m going with: given all we have constantly heard about how much the front office specifically loves schwarber and how good he is at all their weird brain tests and stuff, if they think it is time to trade him and aren’t scared about missing out on monster seasons, it is probably time to trade him and we shouldn’t be scared about missing out on monster seasons.

don’t sell it short, it’s also more fun to reload nsbb over and over until you get the scam site and then go there and give it your amazon password and social security number and bank account information than it is to think about the 2018 cubs

theo deserves extreme scrutiny on issues like this one, not the benefit of the doubt. i wish they’d just release russell, but i guess i get it if they trade him for nothing instead. if they bring him back, i think that will probably be it for me as a fan of the team.

2015 David Ross would be an improvement. Vic isn't a good defensive catcher and also can't hit. It would be nice to have a backup C that's decent to good at one of those. agreed. just get someone who can actually frame. shouldn’t cost much at all.

i bet the cubs didn’t have a sense of urgency because they read too many of duke’s posts and thought everything would be fine no matter what wow good point guess we have to ban duke yep you are right ban tyme

i don’t like the idea of bringing maddon back without an extension at all. he does not strike me as the type who would handle that well. fire him (preferred) or add another year to his contract. this in-between is the worst way to go.

congrats on getting to plug how smart you were for being negative immediately after the cubs won the word series. maybe go back to not posting.

bryant's strikeout in the 12th where they were obviously pitching around him to get to terrance gore was pretty bad, too. I’m ok with this. Gore is not going to do anything. Might as well see if Bryant can end it with a dong. It’s a long shot, but so is Gore doing anything productive with the bat. i think bryant’s hr rate on sliders low and out of the strike zone is probably like -40. it’s a nice idea, but he wasn’t being pitched to.

W-L for game thread starters is stupid. You may have a nice "record" but the underlying peripherals showed you were doing it with nothing smoke and mirrors. also we make this dumb stat so important but when you really look at why should the game thread starter get all the credit for the win? sure that poster started the thread, but it is the players who do all the catching and throwing hitting and such. perhaps some of the credit should go to them.

(1) lester doesn’t have it, gets pulled in the fifth (2) offense shows up but pen can’t hold it together. cishek gives up the biggest hit.

Eloy and Torres are Cuban, aren’t they? And beautiful Jorge the first two are not cuban and the last guy sucks

you are john ham saying this is not the end and all of us are the people going about their business and moving on since we know it is the end A game thread but without images, just describing gifs in detail erik wearhaim brain explosion and also galaxies

you are john ham saying this is not the end and all of us are the people going about their business and moving on since we know it is the end BEHIND THE SCENES/DIRECTOR’S COMMENTARY i typed all that out because i pretty much had to describe the joke for it to work and i was too lazy to find the gif, but then i was afraid that he said “this isn’t over” or something and i wanted to get it right, so i had to find the gif just to confirm that i had it right. then i was still too lazy to add it to my post. then i decided my post wasn’t quite funny enough so i went back and spelled jon hamm’s name wrong. and then the hearts started a rolling in.

you are john ham saying this is not the end and all of us are the people going about their business and moving on since we know it is the end

Oh he absolutely is using Hamels i agree that hamels is 100% coming in. it’s also important to remember that the praise or blame for that rests as much on epstein and the front office as it does maddon. he talked to joe and they made this roster together. when joe decides it’s time to remind everyone how wacky he is, theo won’t be able to act surprised.

i am true fool and took a half day off work to watch this game. look for my posts to get extra spicy if/when things go south.

horsefeathers yes i won the 6-3 tiebreaker over goony and ssr by being the best at posting

Poison meatballs i’ve heard good things about this one basketball coach’s lasagna, hopefully it’s that

Dammit Theo why don’t you have a crystal ball jeff sullivan of fangraphs and effectively wild regularly talked up mikolas and expressed extreme skepticism of chatwood all offseason. it didn’t take a crystal ball to be right in a way that would have saved our season.

montgomery for the season. just like all the smart people promised us all year.

glad this game is at 1:20, that way i can forget it’s happening and then check my phone while leaving work early to learn that the cubs are losing 7-1 in the 7th inning and that i don’t have to bother watching any more games this year

I will be perfectly happy if we get Machado and he's a plenty good player, but I won't be upset if they lose out on him. I'll only be upset if they lose out on Harper. I'd rather do other things than sign Machdo if we miss on Bryce and allocate that money elsewhere. Machado is plenty good like I said but I don't know if I'd be willing to commit to him the money it will take to get him, there's just some red flags to me that he's not truly elite. You cited those 6 war seasons but that was largely due to playing elite defense at 3B (a position we presumably aren't signing him to play) and offensively he's also never been this player before this year he's always been more of a 7% BB guy and not 10%+ like this year and while 7% is fine it's not great, he already has 2 major leg/knee injuries and a bigger body that I don't see him handling SS long term and he doesn't even handle it great now, Harper has elite on base skills and the power is probably better while Machado does have good power but not special on base skills, Harper's defense this year is also with him playing a lot of CF which I doubt he plays with us much at all he's fine in the corners and maybe even moves to 1B down the line in the post Rizzo years, just looking at their career numbers Harper is a elite bat that I'll be disappointed to miss on, Machado is a good to very good bat that I won't be all that mad to miss on for the money he'll cost. Machado has been a lot more like the player he's always been since his trade to the Dodgers too after his crazy start, which again is plenty good but idk if I'd pay the $300million to have that (.267/.333/.486 slash line, 8% bb rate and 18% k rate, wRC+ of 119). I'd just rather spend that money on some bullpen options, look to trade and maybe take on some money for a guy (idk who that may be but like Brandon Crawford maybe?), or sign other FAs like Marwin Gonzalez or Eduardo Escobar to fill SS/MIF. Again Machado is plenty good and I'd be happy to have him because he does make us better I just have some reservations on how good he actually is and don't necessarily think giving him the huge money deal is the smartest thing when we could allocate it better and probably make us as good in adding 3-4 other pieces with it. what is this a desire for a business meeting with the star of gary unmarried in which he just shows me the same chart twice cause i need mohr pair of graphs

i can’t believe it would go well at all, but it’s not like things can get any worse. let’s let her start at third base. john can buy a ticket.

you keep posting that the cubs just didn’t bother to trade for yelich. who would we have given up? remember that the marlins are doing a twelve year rebuild and probably didn’t want trade packages centered on guys who had already made the majors and used up cheap years.