Sammy Sofa

Joe stinks.

But seriously, Strop is kind of the best. Dude can seemingly get anyone fired up/motivated.

I think that cuts off too soon; maybe I was laughing too hard at the time, but I thought Strop kinda finally cracks up a bit.

That article should singlehandedly resurrect FJM.

I thought that had been the assumed end result for a long, long time.

yeah. i'm not much of a merchandise collector at all. i used to own a sammy sosa bobblehead until its head bobbled right off, and that's about the extent of my bobblehead collecting history. the rizz/kb one was sweet, and it would have been cool to have, but i was more just baffled how poorly the whole thing was run. and they were immediately--like right after we found our seats in the bleachers--showing up on ebay for several hundred dollars. People were selling the Baez ones on the spot for at least $100. I checked today out of curiosity on eBay after this came up and they're still going for at least $135. Madness.

horsefeathers, I was using my family's season tickets and we still got the shaft. That said, we ended up giving the one we got away to the firs heartbroken kid we came across, and would have just done the same if we had actually gotten the second, too. Yeah, I wanted one, but I felt much worse for the kids that didn't get any because a bunch of manbabies and Trixies were losing their minds and knocking people out of the way to get their hands on them.

I was in the bleachers last July for the makeup game against the Brewers when they were giving away the Rizzo/KB bobblehead. It was hot as hell and I waited in line for several hours before the bleachers opened, was easily one of the first 3,000-4,000 or so people in the park, and they "ran out" of the bobbleheads before I got to the front of the line. Apparently, they only set a certain amount aside for the bleachers or something? Really dumb. They said they ran out at the gate I entered on Baez Day and were yelling at people to keep moving and getting us past the barricades to keep it from becoming truly dangerous, even though there were boxes in the corner against the wall and barricades with a bunch of Roasts standing in front of them like they were successfully hiding them. I got ushered past the barricades, and then they started passing out and opening those other boxes within 2 minutes, and they wouldn't let anyone they had told to go through because they had supposedly run out of bobbleheads get one. Given how obscenely expensive their tickets are, and with all of the construction/expansion they've done, to act like they can handle 10k max of any giveaway is shitty as hell.

And man, I'm still a little annoyed about the Baez bobblehead debacle; only 10k of the things (and most of their big giveaways) is dumb and bad*. Even BCB has the right take on this: https://www.bleedcubbieblue.com/2018/7/24/17607906/cubs-giveaways-promo-items-crowd-control *Despite having the best record in the NL

Last time I was in Pittsburgh they were giving out Jordy Mercer bobbleheads and they were, of course, giving away as many as each person could carry because it's a horsefeathering Jordy Mercer bobblehead and a Pirates game in Pittsburgh. When I was at the Cubs game for the Baez bobblehead giveaway, it was a terrifying mob scene and my guest and I were barely able to escape with just one (and our lives). The Cubs managed to lose both games. I'm not sure what that all means. Hopefully nobody is giving out any bobbleheads.

Simply repeating "best record in the NL" over and over and over again ends up just becoming this overly simplistic thing to shrug of ANYTHING that could be perceived as critical of the team's performance to this point. Pointing out areas where they have or are struggling doesn't somehow negate their record, nor does it automatically means there's a bunch of people here who think the team is terrible or not good. Besides 17 Seconds saying what you quoted, r_mack being r_mack, and Kyle half-joking about playing in the WC game, acting like you're bravely having to battle back a tidal wave of negativity that thinks this team is toast is pretty silly at this point.

And hell, I think if they even just go .500 the rest of the way they're almost certainly set. It's not like I'm sitting here thinking they need to suddenly become offensive juggernauts to pull this off. Just get to the playoffs with the starting rotation not a complete coal mine inferno and some semi-working version of Bryant and let's see what happens.

I know this is your thing now, but what was the threshold that they passed in the first half where you decided that the RD was legit and not just an arbitrary collection of endpoints? 40 games? 50? 60? Like, it just seems SLIGHTLY ahead of yourself to be getting all cocky on their offense right now. I think pretty much the only time I've referenced RD seriously this year was in early May or whenever when we were a couple games over .500 but the VRD said we had played better. I thought it was fluky that our offense was so boom-or-bust with so many 12+ run games and the long droughts. They've been a lot more stable offensively since then. And our Pythag record is now the same as our actual record. I agree that we haven't played well lately. We were probably unlucky then and are lucky now. But that horsefeathers happens. I think it's silly to take a completely arbitrary VRD sample out of a larger whole, though. I don't think it's silly at all to simply point out that, not coincidentally, they've had a pretty unremarkable stretch at best where, again, not coincidentally, the offense has looked...uninspired. It doesn't mean they're fucked, or that this will continue, and it's awesome that the stupid Brewers remembered who they were at about the same time, but basically taking a "LALALALALALALALA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU APPROACH" to how one of the things most stable about them is how little they score for weeks now is a tad goofy. There's better things to start swinging your dick over, that's all.

I know this is your thing now, but what was the threshold that they passed in the first half where you decided that the RD was legit and not just an arbitrary collection of endpoints? 40 games? 50? 60? Like, it just seems SLIGHTLY ahead of yourself to be getting all cocky on their offense right now.

HUZZAH.

Alright, these dorks need to capitalize on the Sasquatch-like rarity that is a good Lester start.

Me watching whoever the horsefeathers is pitching for the Cubs:

Nova is horsefeathering playing with fire right now. ... Uhhhhh, where the hell is everyone?

Is...is it safe to look?

The Cubs before taking the field behind Lester:

He'd refuse to call anything except playoff games.

Oh, sonuva-.... I thought I was getting Hamels on Saturday. Dammit.

has trump even set a date for the military parade yet? KB might wanna get the surgery first so he's 100 percent by then 2 weeks after world series And the Cubs will, of course, have their own float to top off the 7 visits they'll have made to the WH by that point. And instead of Dexter giving Obama some awesome custom Jordans, it's just gonna be the Ricketts tripping over each other to give Trump a pair of pre-licked boots.

As I mentioned before, I'm gonna be at the Saturday and Sunday games, so the Cubs better get their wins before then.