Sammy Sofa

If the Cubs make another WS run, I shudder to think what the horsefeathering moneky's paw is going to unleash this time.

...your lunch at the thought of the Ricketts' milky paws oozing over the WS trophy? Same.

he threw hard Right into our hearts.

7.4 CAREER fWAR. NEVER HAD A 2 fWAR SEASON. WHY GOD WHY.

That was almost a dealbreaker for me and my burgeoning understanding of sabermetrics back in the day.

That's his source.

Don't act like you're too good for some juicy hatewatching.

I am dreading some kind of Faustian nightmare where Russell emerges from his suspension playing amazingly, and inexplicably becomes the MVP-type piece that pushes them over the top. That storyline is so impossibly grotesque (and really any kind of BS "redemption" storyline that results in him still playing for the Cubs), and I loathe that he is still a part of this team.

I'm going to enjoy not recognizing the slew of zilches they acquired this offeseason clogging up the spring training photos.

A dramatic recreation of this dude's reporting process:

Lowest rated SB in a decade.

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Man, even Cubs twitter has given up on this nonsense.

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We are all broken inside.

Which is why it makes the most sense that rookie deals are cut down. Rookie contracts should be down to 3-4 years (though I think they'll likely only be able to cut it down to 5), and you should have to first bring up a player within 3 years (at the very most) instead of 5.

Both guys are only 26, and have been each worth approx. $236 million in about 7-ish seasons of play apiece. Yes, but they are up against a mountain of dumb contracts that owners have signed off on in recent years that is now making everyone nervous about laying out 10 years. It's not fair, but every contract from Pujols to Hosmer is stacking up against Harper and Machado's demands. Smart people realize that Harper =/= Hosmer, but owners are using those bad decisions as an excuse to not back the Brinks truck up for the guys who actually deserve it They're making horsefeathers up because they realized they can game the system based off of the shitty player negotiations from the last collective bargaining agreement; stop with your tortured caveats that basically amount to, "look, this is BS, but I can actually kinda see where they're coming from with this BS, so they're not all wrong." The vast majority of teams could easily afford either guy and are simply either choosing not to try (and a bunch of those are simply choosing not to try at anything besides being awful, period), or trying to lowball a couple of generational talents like THAT'S inexplicably the way to course correct shelling out for much older and much worse players (when most of the time those "bad contracts" either paid off or broken even or came pretty damn close; the truly bad ones are still the obvious exceptions and not the rule). Plus it's ridiculous to continually say things like, "nervous about laying out 10 years;" nobody is ACTUALLY paying for either for a decade unless something goes really wrong and they don't opt out well before then. They're horsefeathering disingenuous scum acting like they're locking themselves into a 8 or 10-year deal with a couple of guys this good and this young (nevermind how ridiculous it is to be hemming and hawing even if they WERE actually locking in with guys, again, this good and this young).

Both guys are only 26, and have been each worth approx. $236 million in about 7-ish seasons of play apiece.

Vaunted market inefficiency.

Just planning to sideswipe the league next season when they only have 3 starters and 38 relievers on constant rotation on and off the DL.

It's an imaginary, arbitrary pool. Not if the owners have collectively decided that profit margins >>>>> winning

case in point No, I've never said that spending money on these players is bad, and I'm not (never) siding with ownership. I'm just pointing out that Harper's particular demands limit his pool of interested teams, and he has to decide if that's worth the record contract. I wish it wasn't that way It's an imaginary, arbitrary pool.