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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. Sammy Sofa
    Unless he was threatening God, like, "see what I can do? You try and take that guy and I'm coming after you," in which case I take back my take back.
  2. Sammy Sofa
    I'm taking it back; Rizzo was wishing death on the guy. He's a monster.
  3. Sammy Sofa
    ... http://i.imgur.com/PLfIG6L.gif
  4. Sammy Sofa
    I'm just looking at it in the vague terms of "bad," "OK," "good" and "great. Very scientific.
  5. Sammy Sofa
    And to clarify, my desire of these huge signings would be predicated on being indicative of the Cubs actually being able to act like the grown-ass ballin' big market team they should be. I only want them spending big once they can actually eat said spending when necessary a la the Dodgers or the Angels.
  6. Sammy Sofa
    http://www.spin.com/articles/sad-jack-white-cubs-baseball-game-photo-stadium/
  7. Sammy Sofa
    Check out Cutler's enormous va.... ...n. http://deadspin.com/jay-cutler-drove-to-camp-in-a-big-ass-van-is-still-the-1609890240
  8. Sammy Sofa
    I described all of the Jack White at Wrigley photos as him looking like an angrily hissing cat. That dude is PISSED.
  9. Sammy Sofa
    Soler: I know you can read my thoughts, Theo. Just a little reminder: if I find out you cut me, your ass is mine. Yes, you heard me; I think words I would never say. Rizzo: I know you can read MY thoughts, Theo...MEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOW.
  10. Sammy Sofa
    i like to think that jorge soler literally tells theo things like "now is my time," preferably via unsolicited text messages at 2am I prefer via painful telepathy. he's always telling jorge not to do it between 4 and 5 because that's theo's time but then jorge just does it anyway Sometimes he switches Lake's and the organ player's brains just to see if anyone notices.
  11. Sammy Sofa
    It may have something to do with the vague wording. Yup. It goes from "slightly" to "significantly," when all I want to vote for is "I think the defense will be just OK." Which is fine.
  12. Sammy Sofa
    YES. Nothing more satisfying than clocking a hard-hitting robot batter with a 200 MPH fastball and hearing that breaking sound.
  13. Sammy Sofa
    i like to think that jorge soler literally tells theo things like "now is my time," preferably via unsolicited text messages at 2am I prefer via painful telepathy.
  14. Sammy Sofa
    I've stupidly wanted every big name FA that's come up since Theo and co. were hired and that's likely never going to change barring all of the prospects coming up and being amazing. This rebuild has broken what little baseball acumen I had and now I am meatballin' hard.
  15. Sammy Sofa
    The gnashing of teeth and rending of garments is in response to all the 90 loss seasons. Cespedes is just another brick in the wall, but that doesn't mean fans who actually care about results of the major league team are not allowed to wish they signed him. Or does it? I'm saying Mr. Sofa's bizarre obsession with Cespedes specifically isn't based on anything rational. In hindsight I'd rather they signed Cespedes instead of DeJesus+Schierholtz, but it's about #528 on the list of regrets which is why I don't repeatedly rue the day that he got away. It's humorous hyperbole based on an "obsession" with the Cubs failing to sign really any valuable longterm everyday FA under the current FO. I wasn't even the one who brought him up.
  16. Sammy Sofa
    No one is saying that. Just that it's not a guy you stay up at night thinking "man, what could have been...". I would have like the Cubs to have signed him, but by this time next year (in a hypothetical world where we signed him) he very well could be blocking someone. Not everyone agrees, but I think Bryant ends up in the OF. Soler is coming, and all signs point to Alcantara being the CF. Of course next season is that last on his contract and he could be moved, and having him the the last few years would have been nice, but I'm less and less bothered by missing out on him every day. Or having Cespedes gives you more freedom to move guys in trades. Or he himself could have been a tradeable asset. The Cubs avoided nothing bad by not signing him.
  17. Sammy Sofa
    I don't think there was anyone with any histrionics over him besides me, and that was a long ass time ago. Just thought dismissing him as "meh," as if the Cubs couldn't have used him or he was some kind of bust or cost too damn much, was silly.
  18. Sammy Sofa
    A clothes tree with a jersey on it.
  19. Sammy Sofa
    Didn't have to be a building block to justify signing him; given the Cubs' needs and the money not spent a solid OF worth his contract would have been a nice pick up. It just seems a bit much to dismiss him as "meh" when the Cubs could have and should have walked away with both him and Soler, especially since such moves would have been more in line with the rhetoric they were spouting at the time. He's an average to slightly above average LF with power, some defense, and poor OBP skills. He is more than 'meh', but he's not someone to lament. Why not? Having Cespedes wouldn't be blocking anyone, and even a slightly above average OF would have been preferable to the raging tire fire throughout the OF. I know the FO has had a bizarrely lucky streak of missing out on FA's that have been busts, but it's not like it's a "phew, really dodged a bullet there" with all of their misses.
  20. Sammy Sofa
    Didn't have to be a building block to justify signing him; given the Cubs' needs and the money not spent a solid OF worth his contract would have been a nice pick up. It just seems a bit much to dismiss him as "meh" when the Cubs could have and should have walked away with both him and Soler, especially since such moves would have been more in line with the rhetoric they were spouting at the time.
  21. Sammy Sofa
    "Cut."
  22. Sammy Sofa
    http://t.fod4.com/t/36bcdff15d/c640x360_31.jpg
  23. Sammy Sofa
    Theo and co. put the hex on them because they weren't their guys. They tried to do the same with Castro and Baez, but they were too mighty to be felled.
  24. Sammy Sofa
    I wonder what A New Era thought he was replying to up there.
  25. Sammy Sofa
    http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-AEtHFn-63wM/UR9hwWb2xRI/AAAAAAAAKb8/6knnJV_Hlic/s1600/ryan-theriot.gif
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