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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. Sammy Sofa
    So I guess the secret to last year was avoiding Schwarber's succubus-like awfulness being around all season.
  2. Sammy Sofa
    Help the Cubs, Javier Baez; you are their only hope.
  3. Sammy Sofa
    Haw-haw!
  4. Sammy Sofa
    NEVERMIND. I WAS A FOOL TO FEEL HOPE.
  5. Sammy Sofa
    Time to make everyone Jizzo, buddy.
  6. Sammy Sofa
    Do more of that so it's less painful when Baez has to take over SS after Russell completely loses the ability to play baseball.
  7. Sammy Sofa
    One AB where he was getting terrible calls from the ump; the rest of it he just wasn't doing too hot and was giving up annoying singles.
  8. Sammy Sofa
    So were all those comeback wins early in the season the sign of a mighty offense overcoming a bit of a struggling or a terrifying foreshadowing of what was really to come?
  9. Sammy Sofa
    Dexter, please, take pity upon us.
  10. Sammy Sofa
    This team stinks worse than a Sublime mosh pit.
  11. Sammy Sofa
    Just killing time until the Cubs make me want to kill myself.
  12. Sammy Sofa
    Mercy was shown by...Molina?
  13. Sammy Sofa
    PRAY FOR THE DEAD.
  14. Sammy Sofa
  15. Sammy Sofa
    Joe picked up the stickiest of the icky while out West and now he's toast for a while.
  16. Sammy Sofa
    Happ inexplicably leading off again.
  17. Sammy Sofa
    Holy horsefeathers: https://screengrabber.deadspin.com/marlins-reporter-saved-by-reflexes-well-placed-clipboa-1795776832
  18. Sammy Sofa
    Up to a 36% K rate. It's just nuts that Joe thinks he should heap this much pressure on the guy. It's a fine line between eccentric and just being a drunk maniac in a van.
  19. Sammy Sofa
    Russell and Schwarber have somehow completely collapsed as capable professional baseball players. It's absolutely painful to witness.
  20. Sammy Sofa
    Yes. And Wade Davis. Bryant should just get everyone's long-term contract rolled into 1. MONTERO SAYS horsefeathers YOU GUYS I AM GOOD.
  21. Sammy Sofa
    Oh, the Cubs scored? Don't worry, Lackey is gonna GIVE IT AWAY NOW.
  22. Sammy Sofa
    *Bryce Harper considering Cubs* *Bryce Harper watches a recent Cubs game* *Bryce Harper no longer considering Cubs*
  23. Sammy Sofa
    I didn't know it existed until, like, 3 months ago.
  24. Sammy Sofa
    MTV Classic shows videos still? That's pretty much all they show. I'm talking about the channel actually called "MTV Classic."
  25. Sammy Sofa
    None if we keep playing like this I mean, don't they still kinda have to? This rotation is just going to keep getting older and the FA market isn't looking too hot.
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