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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. Sammy Sofa
    It's still insane to deem someone doomed after one game. Our sexy, cool criticisms of Heyward are clearly based on hard science.
  2. Sammy Sofa
    Fixed that for you, homie.
  3. Sammy Sofa
    http://www.bleachernation.com/2017/09/09/beware-of-voodoo-brewers-made-a-javy-baez-doll-out-of-baseballs-in-the-dugout/
  4. Sammy Sofa
    Uh, one of these dudes is not like the others. With Bryant it's weird because he's so good otherwise. Zobrist has been a broken old man for most of the season.
  5. Sammy Sofa
    This is the dumbest first place season ever.
  6. Sammy Sofa
    Crawford at least had the decency to be almost 30 when the season where he fell off of cliff happened. Heyward was just horsefeathering 26.
  7. Sammy Sofa
    This is such a bizarrely casual game. It seems more like it's being played by two teams completely out of competition.
  8. Sammy Sofa
    Holy horsefeathers; Bryant really DOES only have 59 RBI. That's....insanity.
  9. Sammy Sofa
    Why am I watching this instead of more Bojack?
  10. Sammy Sofa
    horsefeathers Lackey; he crushes spirits early and dooms them to a slow death because they're too sad to score at least 3 measly runs.
  11. Sammy Sofa
    Soriano managed an almost 15 fWAR with the Cubs in about 5 seasons' worth of play.
  12. Sammy Sofa
    Imagine how much he'll such when the balls aren't juiced. He won't hit anything past the mound.
  13. Sammy Sofa
    GOOD JOB, GOD BOY.
  14. Sammy Sofa
    He's probably just gonna be another Daryle Ward.
  15. Sammy Sofa
    Thudbutt's been pretty rank for about a month now.
  16. Sammy Sofa
  17. Sammy Sofa
    Black Twitter, do your thing. These things are BRUTAL.
  18. Sammy Sofa
    They look like someone skinned Jabba the Hutt and then laced them up with the strings from Crown Royal bags.
  19. Sammy Sofa
    The dude in the seats just staring at it kills me every time.
  20. Sammy Sofa
    65-12 Falcons.
  21. Sammy Sofa
    That sounds like a particularly loathsome sex act.
  22. Sammy Sofa
    Hey, I'm pissed they moved the game, too; work is DRAGGING today, and I need me some afternoon baseball. You better not have me waiting for some sucking, you sucky sucks.
  23. Sammy Sofa
    Joe passed out half and hour ago.
  24. Sammy Sofa
    I think you're alone on #2. horsefeathers them. Yes, I am bitter. But I am relishing every minute of this after all the stupid articles about them being the best team ever. I hope they win 102 games, have a lower RD than the 2016 Cubs and then lose in the NLDS. #-o http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/2013/09/spicy.gif
  25. Sammy Sofa
    Lester is balls wild.
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