weis21

talking to myself in the game thread makes me miss fred. know he's looking down on this one

almora's best plate appearance i've seen. i mean i could have stood up there and watch 4 pitches thrown into the left-hander batter box, but tipping my cap nonetheless.

ugh. should be 3-0

bullpen has been...solid? if this ryan cat can take care of lefties then send rosario to iowa for eternity

Willy!!!

lol ok cash in on this. rizzo lucky with thames being atrocious acting like a 1B and then javy with the swinging bunt. c'mon scwarbs!

guess that's as far as he can hit it

zo and heyward with really excellent at bats. now it's time for kris to not let us down................................

damn. i thought for sure bote's ball was going to split the gap

Agree completely. I definitely think CBB 3 point shooters get more than their fair share of “fouls” that don’t actually occur. The foul on Guy wasn’t one of those times.

Hello again friends. I'll be honest, I took TT's advice (which is proper for all things sans tipping) and didn't watch much of the game last night. Had company over to watch the basketball games but did have the cubs streaming on the computer. And I saw the FIRST - feels silly to type that word in this context - Heyward dong and I knew at that moment that all the stars had aligned and it was going to be a win for these jerks. From there I saw bits and pieces of the cubs scoring a horsefeathers-ton of runs in the 8th inning and the bullpen (lol) doing it's thing and such. Anyway, the W was flown and here we go: Clubs go with this gentleman: Kyle Hendricks is apparently a very smart man because he went to an ivy league college. He's probably good at math and science and drinks lots of coffee whilst scouring over the advanced scouting reports of these brewers. The last game he pitched he was very average, however, and the defense sucked and everyone kind of hated life and wasn't really feeling the winning thing. But, now Jason Heyward is just donging dudes to death and so Kyle will channel his inner 2016 NLCS self and stunt on these asshats for 7.2 innings of 1-run baseball. It's on. God's favorite team decided to go with last year's LLWS MVP: Zach Davies appears to be a child. Although, his manager appears to be his slightly older teenage cousin who just got his licence and drives around blasting rap music with the windows rolled down in his Ford Fusion. So, I'm not exactly shocked. Anyway, the Cubs should have it easy today because the MLB preview says young Zach will be pitching in Wrigley Field today for the first time since April 29 of last year. WTG, Zach. He's apparently a dummy and Kyle and all the smart kids are going to laugh and laugh and laugh. Let's make it two, Cubs.

i know, omc. i was just being sarcastic. i hate this/them too. the degree in which the pitching sucks absolutely defies logic

sorry. i tried my best : (

I'd really love Webster to get a shot (and sooner rather than later). I guess the same goes for Mekkes, Norwood and Wick, too, for that matter.

So, here we are friends. Instead of Cubs (or Cobs), my 3 year old calls them the "clubs" which kind of makes sense because watching them only makes me want to club a bunch of baby seals. I always knew he was smart but I think that's next level genius. Here we go: The Clubs have this guy: His name is Coal. He's hoping to fuel the clubs to victory tonight. He's got a 9.00 ERA but he's struck out 4 hitters this year. Here is what cubs.com preview had to say about Coal's last start: "the lefty was effective until the fourth inning in which he walked the bases loaded and then gave up a grand slam". hahaha. that's like saying, "yesterday i was an effective driver up until i pulled out of my driveway and ran directly into a ditch" God's favorite team chose this guy: The dork with the glasses for the vaunted ones is Corbin Burnes. He sports a 7.20 ERA and a 6.60 FIP. With numbers like that I really hope the clubs pitchers take notice and hopefully they can pick up a thing or two themselves. Well I said last night horsefeathers this horsefeathers I'm done. But, being the dummy I am, I signed up for some godforsaken reason to start one of these.

I give up. horsefeathers this horsefeathers

How can the whole damn pitching staff be THIS bad?

Yes. Let’s walk Cain to load the bases for Yelich

It’s so sad that I’m so defeated that I can’t possibly imagine them winning this game. I mean I guess they will win again but they look so completely horrible that it just doesn’t make any sense. What a shitshow

@Tom

mugs are capable of holding other liquids

horsefeathers everything

5 walks this inning. Oh and a bases clearing double. Impressive

Wow I’m shocked mono-boy is missing the plate and not blowing everyone away with his stuff

Wtg Steve. God i hate so many of these asshats