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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. doritos Not to this day. Lasted a good 15-20 years though Spaghettios. Beefaroni. Peeps. Scallops.
  2. Banana-fana-fo-ferpes.
  3. Yeah, I didn't eat hot dogs for years and years because I was convinced one made me barf as a kid. Still can't eat any kind of "cool ranch" chips to this day because of how sick I got when I was, like, 10 and the puke tasted like it was made of the damned ranch flavoring powder on Doritos.
  4. Wait, why were your lips burning when you ate them like that? Are you the Ashy Larry of robots?
  5. http://deadspin.com/that-anthony-rizzos-such-a-sweet-boy-1728484726
  6. Well, great, I think it came across like I just had a violent stroke at work trying not to laugh at that.
  7. Thanks for your unrequested opinion on the exsistance of God. Not really sure what it has to do with the subject of this thread though. http://i.giphy.com/gdKAVlnm3bmKI.gif
  8. Well we know at the very least that he will own this month: March/April - 6.23 May - 1.76 June - 5.74 July - 1.66 August - 5.04 Career September ERA - 3.20 (2nd best month of his career after 3.15 in July) This, however, would bode poorly for October. Aren't his career playoff stats pretty damn good?
  9. The Bears might not even technically count as a football team at this point.
  10. Guy with 18 HR on the season hits a HR. http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_oG2ffHT1kXk/SmS0Xqlql3I/AAAAAAAAFDQ/RyqA1KXiU4k/s400/moon.onion.jpg YES. There's zero chance that anyone would be dumb enough to think Brandon Moss hitting a home run would be a lucky break; clearly he's bragging about one of his Cardinals doing well.
  11. Nats are closer to us than we are the Cards. And The Giants are closer to catching the Dodgers than they are us. https://youtu.be/CZd_YyFzPD0
  12. Yeah, the kids and dogs ones are unbeatable. My brother had to do foreign service for the better part of a year and left his dog under my parents' care. She ended up with me in Chicago when he finally got back stateside and my dad and I took her out for a walk out the back door while he came in the front after we picked him up from the airport. When we came back in she just froze when she saw him before absolutely losing her [expletive] mind and knocking him to the floor and just spinning around on top of him and doing this weird yelp-whine and licking him nonstop for a good 10 minutes. Dogs are the besssssssssssssssst.
  13. Gleyber Torres; CSC is a notorious racist. I KEED, I KEED.
  14. If Russell gets on and then Baez ties it I will start going to church again.
  15. Just because you're not getting calls doesn't mean you groove one in there to arguably the hottest hitter in baseball.
  16. In what [expletive] universe are those balls.
  17. Baez is gonna win this thing.
  18. God DAMMIT, Hammel! HOLD UNTIL RELIEVED.
  19. Of course that dumb little mutant hits a HR. OF COURSE. Bet you can't do it again, you baseball troll.
  20. It DID turn out that Ashley Madison was pretty much all robots...
  21. Why the [expletive] would TLS start over both Baez and Castro. This is AN OUTRAGE.
  22. Gruden is a monster, we can agree on that.
  23. Yeah, while he was healthy and running a style of offense that isn't sustainable in the NFL if you want your QB actually upright and in the lineup. He's toast. it's plenty sustainable, it's what the seahawks do. Because Russell Wilson is better and not hobbled. But other than that, sure, it could be the same thing!
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