cubscott34

First World Problems: My thread starter record this year is actually 7-4 Sofa, not 4-3.

Still the Cobs, except for Nico, who showed he hasn't been infected with the Cobs virus yet. Padres are pitching a rookie whose name means "ball". So let's hope he throws a lot of them and the Cobs don't swing at them. That being said, when I see his name, I don't think ball, I think: Now I have to go fry some up. Go Cobs. Just win. That is all.

Cobs win!

3 for 4 with a 3B, 2 runs and 4 RBI and at least one more AB to come. Yeah, not a bad debut.

Nico... best Cub hitter this year.. discuss.

Nico!!

Schwar-bomb!

No one is here so I'm jumping in. If someone ahead of me wants to void this one, by all means go for it. Frankly, it doesn't really matter though because.. Cobs. Seriously, just win Cobs. That is all.

Looks like no one wants anything to do with starting a game thread.

My predictions from yesterday: Lucroy started and got a big hit.... check; Castellanos hit a HR.... check, check; Hamels dominated.... ok, so two outta three ain't bad. Either way, Road Cobs > Home Cubs, at least for one day. Let's keep it going. In today's game we got Yu babe (Yeah, I'm old enough to remember Sonny & Cher) going up against Temper Tantrum Bauer. Despite his childish behavior, Bauer can be good and, in his career he's done well against the Cubs... so long as you don't count two little unimportant games in 2016. One would think that with the way Yu has been pitching it should be a good match up. However, when I looked up the Edith Cox Small Sample Size Stat of the DayTM I learned that Darvish is undefeated on Friday games on the road, at stadiums alongside rivers, when his team scored more than 10 runs in the prior game* so screw Bauer and the Reds, we got this horsefeathers. Schwarber dongs, Yu goes six and the Road Cobs keep on rolling. Go Cubs. Just win. That is all. *The writer does not attest to the accuracy of this stat and recommends that one should never rely on SSS when gambling or otherwise trying to make ridiculous points on a message board

Jedi mind trick.. if the Cubs think its still 8/7 then maybe they will also still think they're at home and not on the road. . . . . . . . Either that or I just cut and pasted my previous day's thread title and forgot to change the date. But really, Jedi mind trick.

So Q was dominant, but Rizzo's donger is apparently broken. No matter though because Happ, Schwarbs and Caratini had his back and the Cubs rolled to an easy win. But that game was at home and now we go on the road.. against the Reds.. who we suddenly stopped dominating this year either home or away. It's time to put up or shut up road Cobs. Start winning on the road and suddenly people will say this division might not be up for grabs anymore. But really, the question of the day is... with a lefty on the mound will we see the debut of the newest cub in the starting lineup? I say yes and I say he gets a big hit while Castellanos also gets his second dong as a Cub as the entire Cubs offense against lefties finally shows some life. Not going to matter though because Hollywood is going to shut them down. Go Cubs. Just win. That is all.

Cubs haven't lost a home series since May. They are going to keep that streak alive. Q dominates and Rizzo dongs. But no memes or gifs from me until you win a series on the road Cobs... Just win. That is all.

The Cubs won a game! Now we move on to the Dodgers... and even worse, Clayton Kershaw is starting. But we got Big Jon going for us, so not all is lost. I believe the bats will continue to dong and Rizzo and Bryant will celebrate when it's all over. Just win Cubs. That is all.

It's Hollywood vs. some guy who I've never heard of and can't pronounce. Somehow though, that guy beat Jacob DeGrom in his last start... and he did it without striking out a batter. Seriously? http://33.media.tumblr.com/4657dfbbb0ba9917e679d39246d82149/tumblr_n7ytve1QS41tfa8pto1_400.gif No matter. We got this. Time for the the bats to wake up. Just win Cubs. That is all.