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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. Sammy Sofa
    Hot damn! That's hot pink! I think I'll classify Jacque's bat's color as "strip club champagne."
  2. Sammy Sofa
    With a first name like his, I would prefer that this period actually be known as "the RENAISSANCE of Jacque Jones."
  3. Sammy Sofa
    The Cubs hold a lead for more than a single inning. WOOOOOOOOH, WINNING STREAK!
  4. Sammy Sofa
    No, but he saw the field for the first time last night, in the bottom of the 9th. His mere presence in the dugout/clubhouse must have given them just the spark they needed. When he punched his glove and hunkered down, you could see the electricity arcing between the players on the field. My legs felt weak and I had to sit down. Somewhere distant, a child wept with tears of joy.
  5. Sammy Sofa
    Someone please clarify this for me...when they say "pink bats," how pink are we talking? Isn't Jacque's bat already pink? Pink bats are hilarious. Breast cancer sucks.
  6. Sammy Sofa
    They listened once... http://home.comcast.net/~sauce1977/stop_sucking.jpg
  7. Sammy Sofa
    They've sucked a lot more when it's been hot and dry.
  8. Sammy Sofa
    Like Popeye doing a handstand.
  9. Sammy Sofa
    If they're honestly working with the idea of making these guys capable pitchers for years to come, I'll happily wait it out until Prior comes back. A healthy rotation of Prior, Zambrano, Wood and Miller plus Marshall plus Maddux? DAMN.
  10. Sammy Sofa
    Most of the "classic" ball clubs have a deep undercurrent of racism that is going to take a LONG time to finally be rid of. It's not usually blatant and pretty easy to avoid, but far too often it's the first thing some people go to when they're pissed at a player or manager. Boston, New York and Chicago are probably the biggest culprits in that area, probably in that order. Yeah, of course it's not everyone, but those are some old teams with some HUGE fan bases, and some of these racist goons last generation after generation.
  11. Sammy Sofa
    Has anyone seen if Prior's calves have deflated? Hmmmmmmmm...
  12. Sammy Sofa
    Jacque Jones apparently loves a LOT of mothers.
  13. Sammy Sofa
    Actually, the guy has gotten freakishly buff in recent years. Maybe he's the extra power bat the team desperately needs right now. http://home.earthlink.net/~mr_neil/carrottop.jpg
  14. Sammy Sofa
    Good thing there is, too...this team plays a LOT of day games. Thanks, Dusty!
  15. Sammy Sofa
    Rock on, my friend.
  16. Sammy Sofa
    I'm still clinging to hope that they don't exceed 8 games lost in a row...that seems to have been their habit for losing streaks the last few years, but any more than that and I may lose my grip on my sanity. Didn't they have an 8 game slide at pretty much exactly this time LAST year? If that means we have 2 more of these debacles to go through before season's end...Christ...
  17. Sammy Sofa
    He could probably hitt better than Neifi, Bynum, Hairy Jerry and Jack Jones combined just clubbing the ball with his cast.
  18. Sammy Sofa
    Reposted for truth: http://home.comcast.net/~sauce1977/stop_sucking.jpg Zambrano needs to pitch AND hit a gem. Somebody has to. But then Pierre would come up and hit into the rarely seen quintuple play, a special occurance only witnessed with players SO fast that they can't slow down around the basepaths and are thrown out at each base.
  19. Sammy Sofa
    Step one...buy a furniture company...
  20. Sammy Sofa
    Me too...but he seems so fragile each season...can anyone prove he wasn't a Cubs pitching prospect at some point?
  21. Sammy Sofa
    A massive silent protest surrounding Tribune Tower. The image of thousands of people decked out in Cubs gear, silently glaring at the suits as they have to come and go seems awesome. Totally unrealistic, but awesome.
  22. Sammy Sofa
    http://home.comcast.net/~sauce1977/stop_sucking.jpg
  23. Sammy Sofa
    I'd much prefer if the fans all just turn and give Hendry the stink-eye if he's at the game. Or they track down MacPhail and boo him. The guys on the team can frustrate the hell out of me, but at this point, it's the people above them that deserve things like booing.
  24. Sammy Sofa
    Or the rest of the year...
  25. Sammy Sofa
    I wouldn't presume to go so far as to say the Cubs losing makes me DEPRESSED, since depression can be VERY serious and in the end this is "just baseball"...but it definitely puts me in a very bad mood that typically dictates how the rest of or the next day will go.
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