Also, what's wrong with wearing a coat like inspector gadget? Trench coats have been in style for decades. And if you needed to change into something you thought was cooler you could always say "go go gadget jorts!"
I believe Bauer was the one who said that pitchers that use pine tar can get a few hundred extra RPM/higher spin rate in an ESPN article. He claimed pine tar gives a significant advantage to pitchers and not just a better grip on the ball to improve control. I think maybe this is what he is insinuating with the Astros pitchers? Pretty much: https://sports.yahoo.com/argument-make-pine-tar-foreign-substances-legal-pitchers-152648272.html ETA, Bauer is saying it should be allowed: [tweet]
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I'm fine with the Cubs paying him the lowest amount he'll accept, but being annoyed that he's hawking products is flat-out weird. He's on a career trajectory where his money is going to make real money for him. Earning as much as he possibly can with low effort is incredibly wise.
If it really bugs you, you could always take the Red Line a few stops north and Uber from there, but you're going to wait at the Addison station anyway. I usually end up walking several blocks west, weather pending.
I'd check a parking app like SpotHero or ParkWhiz to see if you can get something that's a combination of inexpensive, secure, and convenient for the weekend. Either way, depending on how far west you are in Logan Square, an uber won't be too bad.