Sammy Sofa
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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa
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Uhhhhh. Gameday made that called strike look absurdly bad. -
OH, horsefeathers. TONY KEMP WITH THE PH. Almora's time is finally done, son. This game is a winner after all!
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Almora's gonna dong here*. *He may have already grounded out on the first pitch by the time I post this.
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The 1-9 RISP is the typical reason we lose close games on the road. No, it's the run scoring doubles that are clearly the problem, you fool.
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Theo:
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Yeah, but this is what happens if Joe calls him out:
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He kills us every game. He’s another cub killer. Yes, Mr. Sherman; they're ALL Cub-Killers.
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That's what I get for being cautiously optimistic.
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Lord, this asshat has topped out with an OPS of .738, and has twice finished a season with an OPS under .700. But sure, it's coming of the bench where he REALLY struggles.
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Hey, look, when you've accumulated 588 games of mostly middling professional baseball and you're "only" 25, it's like they don't even count at all! 2138 major league plate appearances is pretty average for a young player like Russell. He’s really barely gotten his feet wet. Look at him, he's just like a kid out there!
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Hey, look, when you've accumulated 588 games of increasingly middling professional baseball and you're "only" 25, it's like they don't even count at all!
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Once again liberally missing facts like where I said "bad teams" "Look at how much of a redundant mewling dip horsefeathers I was to pwn the libs! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK AT IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT."
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The 82nd time he hurls his bat into the stands like a complete [expletive] will be the time he calls a press conference to symbolically burn his Pokemon cards and pledge that he's finally decided to put childish things behind him and really buckle down on this baseball thing.
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It's almost like the 43-76 Royals are bad or something.
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For generally sucking at baseball and the end result being the completely unremarkable OPS you keep sweatily kneading your milky pud over.
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I agree that more HBPs for Russell are a good thing. Break something and bring on the starving kids.
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Everyone agreed with your stated conclusions in that one.
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Addison Russell only has a .273 .308 .273 .580 line against the Cardinals this year, so I guess it's a good thing the Cubs won't be playing him against the much better Molina-led Cardinals. They're going to need their best when facing a *checks notes* 37-year old catcher with a -0.2 fWAR this season. They might be better off bringing in Alfred Molina instead.
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Going to?
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Addison Russell has a .277 .362 .482 .844 line in games that the Cubs have lost this season. He has a horrific .206 .288 .302 .589 line in games that the Cubs have won. Clearly his teammates hate him as much as the Cardinals love Molina since they intentionally tank whenever he does well.
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#WhatKids Oh, so now you spitefully want Tony Kemp to never be able to know the joys of bringing life into the world? YOU SAVAGE ANIMAL MONSTER.
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#butwhatabouttonykemp'skids?
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STARVE THOSE KIDS. STARVE THOSE KIDS. STARVE THOSE KIDS.
