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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. I'm foreseeing a leadoff double for Schwarber, a flyout by Willson that moves him to 3B, and then back to back k's by Quintana and Rizzo, all because Joe loves dumb, dumb lineups.
  2. It's horsefeathering hysterical that TOMMY LA STELLA was batting in that situation with Kyle horsefeathering Schwarber and Willson horsefeathering Contreras behind him.
  3. I've mentioned it before, but it's almost like my brain can't process how it feels like they have the scratch out most of their wins, or come back and win, and that they also have the record they have. It's like there's actually a 120-game winning team lurking under this monstrosity. I never thought I'd be so annoyed by a Cubs team this far over .500, but here we are.
  4. (Please make me look even more dumb than usual, Seal Boy)
  5. Bad curve balls and hittable fast balls get pummeled I don't mean the specific pitches today, I mean the entire starting staff this entire season. Quintana was great last season with the Cubs in the 2nd half and in the postseason (outside game 5 NLCS) Lester's old, Darvish has an injury history, Hendrick has a skillset that's always teetering on a thin line between productive and meatball delivery, and Chatwood was always a too clever for its own good-reach to begin with. Hell, Quintana's the only one that's having what's arguably a "weird" off year.
  6. Toss "the Quintana deal was so sneaky and brilliant because he's underrated and signed for so long" onto the pile with, "Addison Russell is only 24!!!!!"
  7. That was actually the first strike he's gotten today off of that miserable curve.
  8. Clobbering the horsefeathers out of a mediocre pitcher weakly serving up meatballs seems like a pretty natural outcome.
  9. [expletive]; this is a Lester-like level of uselessness.
  10. How is Theo such an absolute turd when it comes to pitching, like, 75% of the time.
  11. Someone pull the numbers as to how many games the Cubs have actually scored first. Stop making it harder for yourselves!
  12. Billy Beane is always playing the long game.
  13. Though that means that Happ's .180 .307 .262 .569 second half line is in there.
  14. Unless by "hard" you think we're clobbering him with a cement block, no, we most definitely are not.
  15. Like, does Chacin have an amazing high heater or something? SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY BOTE IS DRYDOCKED.
  16. To be fair to Seal Boy, he is currently slashing .333 .448 .375 .823 in the second half. Granted, that's only 30 PA, but....I dunno; I'm trying to find something here, people. Joe confounds me.
  17. Seriously, that 3-4-5 is the work of dangerous lunatic.
  18. Dude hits a walkoff grand slam and can't even get the next start. I'm pretty sure the Reign of Terror was started for less egregious outrages.
  19. YOU SAY SADDY
  20. Holy horsefeathers. That's terrifying.
  21. It was more like a figure eight.
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