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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. Sammy Sofa
    This dumb bearded snowman made of turds better hit the [expletive] hell out of the ball.
  2. Sammy Sofa
    baseball is all about dingers and strikeouts now, which is like the opposite of chili ball It's overly simplistic, but the Cubs' main problem offensively really is as simple as they don't hit for enough horsefeathering power. Their team BA and OBP have been in the top 2 in all of baseball basically all year, but their slugging is down to #11 and plummeting. Throw in the bizarre cherry on top of how for 3 of 4 seasons they've been near the bottom in being able to capitalize on having guys on 3B with 1 or no outs, and you've got a really annoying recipe for not being able to really take advantage of how often they can get on base. These humps would have been running away with the division for a while now even only if they weren't still inexplicably 22nd in dongs.
  3. Sammy Sofa
    Look, everyone was talking about how brutal their schedule was in the second half. Wait...what's that? Oh, it was the BREWERS' schedule? Well, now I feel silly.
  4. Sammy Sofa
    Current mood: http://i.imgur.com/AZtF8G3.gif
  5. Sammy Sofa
    What in the world is happening.
  6. Sammy Sofa
    You're more drunk than he is.
  7. Sammy Sofa
    They are going to have to hope the combo of Zobrist and Murphy at the top of the order get on base and then have Rizzo dong. They also need to activate KB tomorrow and just put him in the lineup. Maddon- "Murphy was hitting 7th in Washington. Obviously he's comfortable there." But for real though, Heyward's not moving from 2. One of them will leadoff the other 6th or some horsefeathers. I don't really mind Heyward batting leadoff or second right now; he's slashing .305 .359 .390 .749 in August.
  8. Sammy Sofa
  9. Sammy Sofa
    Yup. With the day off I was expecting to see them go out there and wallop on a garbage team, but after, like, 3 innings it was already the equivalent of trying to push a boulder up a hill all over again. With your face.
  10. Sammy Sofa
    Man, I was THIS close to getting a Contreras jersey before this season. Bullet dodged.
  11. Sammy Sofa
    Rizzo pretty much always does. Yeah, dude's back and then some in the second half: .318 .423 .536 .959
  12. Sammy Sofa
    I know what you are saying, but to make my counter-point clear, I would be a VERY consistent hitter in the major leagues. no, you'd be a very consistent out.
  13. Sammy Sofa
    Hey, he's got 3 hours to go; it's legit.
  14. Sammy Sofa
    Just got a heads up from A&I that he is making his scheduled game thread right now, but thanks for being on call, Brandon.
  15. Sammy Sofa
    I've sent Agony and Ivy a PM about tonight's game thread, but if he doesn't have one up within the next 2 hours, then Banedon is on deck.
  16. Sammy Sofa
    won't "accept the lifestyle" of homosexuals
  17. Sammy Sofa
    Someone refresh my memory because I am, of course drawing a blank: is there something annoying about Murphy besides him getting some really big hits against the Cubs? Because those other three dorks were and are varying levels of genuinely obnoxious turdbags.
  18. Sammy Sofa
  19. Sammy Sofa
    And people are pointing out that there's no reason to be worried whether something else or "worse" happened; that was all more than bad enough.
  20. Sammy Sofa
    We can only surmise whether or not the Cubs's Japanese RF was "affected" by the sea of obnoxiously stupid hats and shirts he kept seeing each day, I guess.
  21. Sammy Sofa
    It's time he started going by "Yule Log" because of the appropriate sound effects:
  22. Sammy Sofa
    Agony and Ivy...
  23. Sammy Sofa
    Alright, since I'm off tomorrow morning to put my evil inside the Cubs by seeing them live, Schwarber Fan is standing by as the next game thread starter.
  24. Sammy Sofa
    That is horsefeathering hysterical. horsefeathers YEAH.
  25. Sammy Sofa
    Really was hoping they wouldn't have had to use 4 relievers after Hamels went 7.
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