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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. Sammy Sofa
    "Baseball" is just one word.
  2. Sammy Sofa
    This might be a dealbreaker.
  3. Sammy Sofa
    Sir, this is uncalled for; I have been following the farm system very closely and appreciating the ins and out of a...a...AAAAAAGH, I CAN'T DO IT. MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL BLOWS AND REAL BASEBALL MATTERS AGAIN.
  4. Sammy Sofa
    ZOMG, I'm gonna start going to Cubs games again. COME HOME NOW.
  5. Sammy Sofa
    Guys, we've been through a lot together the last few years, but the important thing is that cooler heads prevailed and we never let negativity get us down! The future is here today and I love you all.
  6. Sammy Sofa
    [expletive], THAT WAS MY IDEA FIRST BUT I WAS IN MEETINGS. Can someone change my status to "cockeyed optimist?"
  7. Sammy Sofa
    I think when they're all up and everything clicks (fingers crossed) they'll realize they are all a part of something extremely special and are trying to do something which hasn't been done in over a century, and they'll love every [expletive] minute of it. I think because of this they'll be open to signing long term deals. They'll all be comning up through the same system together striving to win the World Series. How many World Series teams have had an abundance of players on their roster that came up through the ranks at the same time to reach the highest stage? If that happens, that would have to feel pretty [expletive] awesome for them, and I think they won't want to play anywhere else, at least not for a long time. But that's just my own daydream speculation. Yes it certainly is. We often forget that we are a major market team, capable of generating major market revenue even when they're awful (which is the reason that nobody took their threats to leave Wrigleyville seriously) and the moment they show signs of life, the fans that stopped showing up flock back. Couple this with a front office dream team, and I'm confident that they can get creative enough to lock up a good chunk of the core for quite some time without relying on discounts, and have money left to continue to fill any holes that appear over time. This is all make believe, like elves, gremlins and Eskimos.
  8. Sammy Sofa
    Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck YES.
  9. Sammy Sofa
    http://media3.giphy.com/media/AT6LbRAazEoPm/giphy.gif
  10. Sammy Sofa
    JOIN ME, DAVID.
  11. Sammy Sofa
    See? This guy gets it. Everything that can go wrong will go wrong.
  12. Sammy Sofa
    ... Can I see it?
  13. Sammy Sofa
    I'd like to think it means you were cartoonishly mad, but instead of steam shooting out of your ears it shoots out of your ass because: farts. I can provide slides and an academic lecture for a reasonable fee.
  14. Sammy Sofa
    Truffle, you are the best.
  15. Sammy Sofa
    There's no way I'm leaving as soon as they start winning. I'm gonna be back in so hard like I never doubted them it'll make you steam your shorts.
  16. Sammy Sofa
    That actually makes me feel worse than if they had intentionally tanked.
  17. Sammy Sofa
    This is true. I spent the last week on vacation in the wilds of northern Wisconsin and in the evenings we sat around the mighty fire, stinking of the wilderness and drinking shitty beers and smoking fine cigars and the meatball talk flowed and for the first time ever I didn't even bother trying to argue against any of it...and it felt good. It felt like peace. Tim, this is some of the good stuff you can get in with on the ground floor. I'm gonna crank it up to Whitman-levels in a second.
  18. Sammy Sofa
    Annnnnd you've gone full-Kyle Long time ago.
  19. Sammy Sofa
    That last line should continue, "... just enough to win 79 games and still not have any playoff hopes, and then be deprived of Albert Almora (eh), Kris Bryant, and Kyle Schwarber + three high school arms with good upside." Thank goodness we dodged the terrible drafting they did in Boston. Oh my goodness. You know why this is a horrifically bad argument, right? Only slightly worse than basically saying "we NEEDED to draft at the top to save this team from the nightmare state it was in."
  20. Sammy Sofa
    because javy [expletive] baez doesn't give a [expletive] about your team son Real gully nukkas don't give a [expletive] about bumpkin baseball, nephew. what i'm saying is the guy with the mlb tattoo isn't signing a team friendly anything. it's not a good idea to waste a year of team control because you think the groundballs might be different at the big league level By the time that year would be an issue, if they haven't gotten their [expletive] together financially then...holy hell, I don't even know what that is.
  21. Sammy Sofa
    Come on, the new CBA didn't suddenly turn this into the NBA draft.
  22. Sammy Sofa
    They're going to have to ban me to silence my blazing ax of truth.
  23. Sammy Sofa
    because javy [expletive] baez doesn't give a [expletive] about your team son Real gully nukkas don't give a [expletive] about bumpkin baseball, nephew.
  24. Sammy Sofa
    That last line should continue, "... just enough to win 79 games and still not have any playoff hopes, and then be deprived of Albert Almora (eh), Kris Bryant, and Kyle Schwarber + three high school arms with good upside." Thank goodness we dodged the terrible drafting they did in Boston.
  25. Sammy Sofa
    This is good [expletive]. This is the [expletive] that I want.
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