Sammy Sofa

All of our pants.

Dude, shrink that [expletive].

So fiery.

About an 8.3 on the Cobb Scale. Really? I could be remembering the details wrong but I thought I remember reading that Cap Anson is the biggest reason why there were no black players in the MLB until the 40s. Well, yeah, that's how he ranks so high on the [expletive] Ty Cobb Scale of Racistness.

Yeah, this is clearly serious business, neely.

About an 8.3 on the Cobb Scale.

The Second Age Let's not even acknowledge anything before.

I thought we only did that ironically to someone who sucked.

Any single one of the top five should be available to be part of a trade for Stanton.

Whut.

not everyone http://www.fangraphs.com/statss.aspx?playerid=4579&position=SS#longprojection :? http://www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/dont_you_say_that_billy_madison.gif

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Antici... http://www.dumppix.com/images/imf91_tumblr_mmcudb5sOc1rw.gif

I expect Baez to suck at first; that's why I wanted him up ASAP. It will be glorious.

"Baseball" is just one word.

This might be a dealbreaker.

Sir, this is uncalled for; I have been following the farm system very closely and appreciating the ins and out of a...a...AAAAAAGH, I CAN'T DO IT. MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL BLOWS AND REAL BASEBALL MATTERS AGAIN.

ZOMG, I'm gonna start going to Cubs games again. COME HOME NOW.

Guys, we've been through a lot together the last few years, but the important thing is that cooler heads prevailed and we never let negativity get us down! The future is here today and I love you all.

[expletive], THAT WAS MY IDEA FIRST BUT I WAS IN MEETINGS. Can someone change my status to "cockeyed optimist?"

I think when they're all up and everything clicks (fingers crossed) they'll realize they are all a part of something extremely special and are trying to do something which hasn't been done in over a century, and they'll love every [expletive] minute of it. I think because of this they'll be open to signing long term deals. They'll all be comning up through the same system together striving to win the World Series. How many World Series teams have had an abundance of players on their roster that came up through the ranks at the same time to reach the highest stage? If that happens, that would have to feel pretty [expletive] awesome for them, and I think they won't want to play anywhere else, at least not for a long time. But that's just my own daydream speculation. Yes it certainly is. We often forget that we are a major market team, capable of generating major market revenue even when they're awful (which is the reason that nobody took their threats to leave Wrigleyville seriously) and the moment they show signs of life, the fans that stopped showing up flock back. Couple this with a front office dream team, and I'm confident that they can get creative enough to lock up a good chunk of the core for quite some time without relying on discounts, and have money left to continue to fill any holes that appear over time. This is all make believe, like elves, gremlins and Eskimos.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck YES.

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JOIN ME, DAVID.