exactly. people can argue all they want that there is only one meaning of the word and everybody's minds operate the same way, but any linguist would tell you that is not true whatsoever. you can say Ozzie or my cousin meant it as a slur against homosexuals, but nobody knows how Ozzie's or my cousin's mind works. language is very imprecise, and there are alot of people who lack the ability to articulate with the proper words. as for jam's comments, I have heard and know of several homosexuals that call each other or other homosexuals "[expletive]" and "queer" all the time. do they have no harmful intentions when using that word? the answer is obvious, sometimes they do and sometimes they don't, just like the rest of us. the term is much more flimsy and has alot more meanings and connotations than most racial slurs. one of those meanings is a catchall phrase used by unarticulate people to have no more signicance that calling someone a "jerk." the best analogy I can think of is using the word "gyp" when somebody rips you off. that's the word you know and came to use, not even realizing it is a derrogatory phrase about gypsies. there is nothing in peoples heart or mind that means it as an insult against a group of people. it's just the word that they use in that situation. In one of the examples you used, homosexuals are taking ownership of the word and lessening the hateful impact of the word to their own group, much in the same way blacks have taken ownership of the word "[expletive]". Does that make it right? I can't say. There's been long debate about whether those slurs are too hateful on any level to ever be used as anything less than offensive. The catchall meaning for "[expletive]" is not inarticulate it's ignorant. There's no way people aren't familar with other insults to use to demean someone's masculinity such as "wimp". They use "[expletive]" because it has a much more demeaning connotation due to it's association with homosexuals and the thought that being gay makes you in some way less of a man. Those people are ignorant and there is a level of hate in their use of the word. I would imagine your cousin wouldn't go into a gay bar and say to anyone "[expletive]" with the intention that it's just another regular old insult that he uses. And if he was so ignorant, I would imagine he would be informed pretty quickly how offensive he was. The use of "gyp" is offensive too. It's a slur, as well. Just because the gypsies aren't as numerous in these parts doesn't make it any less so. People use the term "jew" as verb to mean talk someone down in price, are they not being offensive in that instance? You're right. Some people like to say that having to worry about those things is "PC" but I think it's just common courtesy. I'll admit that I used to use "Jew" as a verb without giving much thought to the underlined racist connotation (that is until I dated a guy who was Jewish and figured out how stupid that was...) In fact, his family owns a business on Roosevelt Rd in Chicago (also known affectionately as "Jew Town"). I was in the store once when a patron asked my, ex, boyfriend's father: "you're not trying to Jew me down right?" The sad part is, I don't think the person knew he was Jewish but he apparently thought it was an OK thing to say...