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Sammy Sofa

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Everything posted by Sammy Sofa

  1. Sammy Sofa
    Is everyone hearing this crazy buzzing on the TV feed?
  2. Sammy Sofa
  3. Sammy Sofa
    Ooooof.
  4. Sammy Sofa
    That'll do.
  5. Sammy Sofa
    NO BUNTS, DAMMIT.
  6. Sammy Sofa
    His disgusting-looking legs are actually making me a little angry.
  7. Sammy Sofa
    Doing whatever guys who aren't Theo's first first round pick do. I see. So you think Theo has a powerpoint on his laptop where he ranks all of his first round picks based on how long ago he made the pick? Do you think he values his 3rd round pick from 2015 more or less than his 2nd round pick from 2017? Does he have a rubric to keep all of this straight? I think he has ARod's centaur painting on his wall with Almora's face taped over it*. *"It" being, of course, the majestic ARod centaur dick.
  8. Sammy Sofa
    I'd bet good money this useless turd is still as prominent as he is specifically because he was Theo and co.'s first first round pick. If that's the case, then wtf is Happ in the minors? Doing whatever guys who aren't Theo's first first round pick do.
  9. Sammy Sofa
    I'd bet good money this useless turd is still as prominent as he is specifically because he was Theo and co.'s first first round pick.
  10. Sammy Sofa
  11. Sammy Sofa
    Alright, Andy; it's all yours now.
  12. Sammy Sofa
    [tweet] [/tweet]
  13. Sammy Sofa
    Dramatic recreation of Jeets' complicity in the ongoing scam that is the Florida Marlins:
  14. Sammy Sofa
    DUMP THE CARDINALS WAY DOWN WHERE THEY BELONG.
  15. Sammy Sofa
    The only time anyone ever thought a St. Louis team would win something:
  16. Sammy Sofa
    I think that 636 is actually the total number of hops his "hits" take as they weakly roll into the shallow OF.
  17. Sammy Sofa
    OK, SOMETIMES the internet wasn't a mistake.
  18. Sammy Sofa
    Speaking of Almora...check out this stupid line from the last week: .389 .389 .444 .833 Courtesy of a .636(!!!) BAbip. He's basically a 2 outcome player in that time. 18 PA, with 7 hits and 7 strikeouts (and no walks, of course).
  19. Sammy Sofa
    After his 4th dong in the series.
  20. Sammy Sofa
    This is wonderfully appropriate.
  21. Sammy Sofa
    i don't get it It feels like many of your stories here seem to involved you talking about how insanely drunk you got.
  22. Sammy Sofa
    Holy horsefeathers. He's hulking out.
  23. Sammy Sofa
    No matter how many times it's lights out for David.
  24. Sammy Sofa
    Imagine the horror of being a Cardinals fan: Now wake up to the reality of being a Chicago sports fan: Both are, however, preferable to the terrible luck of being born a Brewers fan: Hopefully Hendricks isn't Bantha poodoo like he was last time out. And hopefully Bryant's hamstring hasn't aged as much as his shoulders. That Baez guy is pretty cool....and all the rest.
  25. Sammy Sofa
    Psh. Call me when it's this guy:
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