The Five Stages of Relief

[Rice Cube]

Image courtesy of © David Richard-Imagn Images

As we await the return of Justin Steele and weather the losses of Matthew Boyd and Cade Horton to the injured list, I considered the grief of being a Cubs fan through this early part of 2026, and recalled the infamous "Five Stages of Grief" in trying to process my feelings. Known as the Kubler-Ross model for its original author, the five stages are well-known—but also widely criticized for oversimplifying the process of grief. Similarly, most Cubs fans criticizing Jed Hoyer for spackling together a bullpen are trivializing the complexities that go into a competent relief unit. But since we have our theme today, let's run through these stages of relief (which might be more concentrated on our feelings about losing Cade Horton for the year, but that's another story for another day).

Denial
This offseason, the Cubs spent a significant amount of money on some relievers with upside. They let Brad Keller go, but we were all fairly excited about the prospect of decent arms like Phil Maton or intriguing arms that could still have magic in them: Hoby Milner, Jacob Webb, and Hunter Harvey. Along with the returning arms, this was supposed to be a superior relief corps, one that could be versatile and lock down games regularly. Instead, three of the aforementioned relievers have suffered extreme meltdowns leading to losses, and even Milner has coughed up a few runs, while striking out nobody to this point. The Cubs can't be that bad at scouting pitching, can they? Didn't they build a Pitch Lab or something? We can't be THAT cursed!

Anger
Why did the Cubs just scrape the barrel again or try to do their magic scouting, instead of just throwing all the money at guys like Devin Williams or Edwin Díaz? Never mind that they still have a perfectly capable Caleb Thielbar and a Daniel Palencia still going off the high of winning the World Baseball Classic with Team Venezuela, or that Colin Rea got yet another three-inning save. If only the Rickettses weren't always so cheap, and Hoyer would actually just throw money at the most volatile personnel in all of sports!

Bargaining
Look, I know these guys are good and all, and maybe it's just the early season cold weather (it really does suck to play baseball in the Midwest in April, I should know, I used to coach high school baseball here in Chicago), but all I'm really asking is that they don't walk people and throw pitches that don't get pummeled over the wall at inopportune times. Is that really too much to ask? I'd even live with the walks, if they'd stop giving up the homers! Or be ok with the homers, if they stopped clogging the bases with walks first!

Depression
Even with an exciting debut in Riley Martin, knowing that most of these guys can't be optioned and aren't going to just be randomly released just yet is annoying—and even if they did cut bait with somebody, the Cubs can't trade for anybody interesting for a couple months anyway, so we're kind of screwed there.

Acceptance
Then again, we're less than 10% into the season, and this team is too good to not figure it out, and that includes the bullpen full of guys who have decent track records, coaches who have found ways to bring the most out of their pitchers, and competent catchers who can guide their battery mates through trouble. We can't get rid of these guys yet, anyway, so we might as well hope that they do figure it out. When they do, along with a resurgence in the offense and a typically elite defense, Cubs baseball will be fun to watch again. You'll see!

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