Kyle Farnsworth

Kyle Farnsworth is a former MLB relief pitcher who played for nine teams across 16 seasons, including parts of six years with the Chicago Cubs.

Originally drafted in the now-defunct 47th round of the 1994 MLB Draft out of high school, though he didn't sign until May 12, 1995, after playing briefly at Abraham Baldwin Agricultural College. A brash, hard-throwing pitcher with all the confidence in the world, Farnsworth trudged through the minor leagues for nearly half of a decade before finally getting the call to the big leagues as a starting pitcher.

In his rookie campaign in 1999, Farnsworth made 27 appearances (21 start), pitching 130 innings and allowing a 5.05 ERA with ugly peripherals, including a 70-52 strikeout-to-walk ratio. He was officially converted to a reliever at the beginning of the 2000 season, though he would oscillate between terrible seasons and great ones out of the Cubs bullpen for the better part of the next five years. Ultimately, he pitched in 343 games for the North Siders (478 2/3 innings), accumulating 0.1 WAR and a 4.78 ERA. The consistency just never matched the overwhelming (at times) stuff, as Farnsworth would spend some years as the team's primary set-up man (2001) and then the next exclusively in mop-up duty.

But, you're not here for the stats, are you? Farnsworth was a walking headline, generating outrageous stories on an annual basis. The one I'll focus on here is obviously the most infamous: a suplex of Paul Wilson.

Yes, on June 19, 2003, Farnsworth upset Reds pitcher (and former No. 1 overall pick) Paul Wilson by pitching him a little too far inside, leading to Wilson taking one too many steps toward the pitcher's mound. Farnsworth needed no further invitation, pile-driving Wilson into the dirt before landing a few haymakers as the benches cleared. It's one of the most one-sided baseball fights in history (no fact-check needed) — look at Farnsworth and Wilson at the end of the video. There is a discrepancy in the punishment each one took. Speaking of punishment, Farnsworth received a three-game suspension for his role in the brawl, eventually getting it reduced to two. All in all, I'd say he got off pretty light.

In terms of other notable stories from Farnsworth's Cubs tenure, he was the winning pitcher in the final baseball game played at Three Rivers Stadium on October 1, 2000. Also, he served a disabled list stint in 2004 after severely injuring his leg by kicking an electrical fan in the Cubs dugout after getting lit up by the Houston Astros. Ah, good times.

Anyway, after the 2004 season, Farnsworth was traded to the Detroit Tigers for for Roberto Novoa, Scott Moore and Bo Flowers. That would begin the journeyman phase of his career, as he pitched for the Tigers, Braves, Yankees, Tigers (again), Royals, Braves (again), Rays, Pirates, Mets, and Astros between 2005-14. He was never particularly great outside of one dominant year as the Rays' closer in 2011, but he was a bullpen tone-setter everywhere he went. He also pitched in four different postseasons, including 2003 with the Cubs, but I've chosen to skip his performance during that playoff run for (what should be obvious) reasons.

Farnsworth retired officially following the 2016 season, eventually becoming an amateur league linebacker as God intended.