The Wrigley Field Experience: A Cubs Parody

It's been an age since I've been able to write for the website with all the life issues and work-related busy stuff I've had to deal with. Still, of course, I was listening to Cubs games and watching when I could, very pleased that they're continuing to do well despite a .500 June "swoon" of sorts. The other day, Shota Imanaga gave up a few solo home runs (including some basket shots), and had a pretty funny bit in his postgame interview (about 25 minutes into this video, if it doesn't jump to it):

The interview also had a bit about his t-shirts, where he's apparently found a fun clothing line that highlights some of the great bands of yore, yet he knows not the songs. But the particular line about the basket being heaven or hell definitely channels "Hotel California," so please enjoy this attempt at parody inspired by Imanaga and sung through his eyes while he watches pop-ups decide where they want to go, depending on the wind...

On the mound here at Wrigley, cool wind in my hair
Warming up to my catcher next to a pantsless bear
Up above on the scoreboard, the flags blow out to right
Then the wind changed and the flags went limp, it was that kind of night

First batter steps to the plate, pops it up toward the well
And I was thinking to myself, "This could be heaven or this could be hell"
Then I looked at the fielder, he was following the wall
The fans and players held their breath, where would this ball fall?

Welcome to the Wrigley Field experience
Where will the wind blow (where will the wind blow?)
Heck, nobody knows
Pitchers are scared of the Wrigley Field experience
Will it be an out (will it be an out)
Or will it fly on out?

This one bounced off the basket, dropped in for a hit
Going to have to buckle down here for the inning to end
Keep the ball in the ballyard, come to a set
The pitch is delivered, bat and ball met

And here's another pop-up, fielder runs on a line
The wind continues to blow, but launch angle's 69
The basket right now looks so far away
Baseball sails in the middle of the sky, will Happ have a play?

Welcome to the Wrigley Field experience
Where will the wind blow (where will the wind blow?)
Heck, nobody knows
Popping it up at the Wrigley Field experience
Each play a surprise (Each play a surprise)
Out or RBIs?

This one's short of the basket, just a sacrifice fly
Next time perhaps hit it on the ground, instead of in the sky
And the flags on the scoreboard, now they fly west to east
The righty batter pokes it opposite field; will this pain never cease?

Last thing I remember, the crowd rose to a roar
That can't get out, can it? Launch angle's forty-four!
Relax, said the fielder, as he raced back to receive
But with the wind blowing into the night, will the baseball leave?