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GvilleCub

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  1. GvilleCub
    (You may mix in a hummable tune for the 1st two stanzas at your option) Ding Dong the Dumpster’s GONE! Can it be? Yes, he’s GONE! Ding Dong the dumpy, Dumpster’s GONE! You tried and tried to hold us up. Bend us over. Lather us up. But rejoice sucklers you may now wake up! (Continue with grave solemnity.) I now declare you to be, with no hint of sentimentality, That you are most morally and ethically, Spiritually and physically, Positively and absolutely, Undeniably and reliably G...O…N...E… GONE! Good riddance, loser! And don’t come back! Please? And to our newest Cubs, WELCOME!!!
  2. GvilleCub
    The Cubs' liberation from Dumpster will be like VE Day. Still, it ain't over till it's over, and the chance that Dumpster might snatch defeat from the mouth of victory remains...
  3. GvilleCub
    I’ve been wondering whether I should get into this thread. My hatred of Dumpster is already off-scale, so I simply have nothing new to say… even if I extend my range. But I will stay long enough to say that I hope some of the former teat sucklers are finally getting a taste of the sour milk and realize that they haven’t been clamped down on Salma Hayek but on a more hirsute version of Rosie O’Donnell. The Horror! Still, some will continue to suckle from those turgid mammaries as if their very life essence depends on it. The Dumpster chuckles, knowing their weakness and dependence, and knowing his job, his mission, is to not only prolong that dependence but to prolong their eternal agony. Failure never tasted so sweet. Thank goodness then, when questioned about all the trade rumors swirling about him, Dumpster, on July 20th, after a losing start against St. Louis, said he had had no problem focusing despite the talk, and that he just needed “TO DO HIS JOB”. On July 25th, after a loss against Pittsburgh, he again reiterated all he was focused on was “DOING HIS JOB”. So as the trade winds have blown over the past week: 2 starts, 2 losses, and an ERA of 5+. Just imagine where we would be without him. Oh, wait, looks like we won’t have to worry about that!
  4. GvilleCub
    Oh for the days of Marla Collins and George Orta. At least Harry played it straight back then and wasn't a parody of himself yet. And the need to fill Harry's big shoes in 1987 led to getting Bill Murray (at his peak) doing a game. Hope the corpse doesn't blow the game for Wood. Would be nice to see him get a win.
  5. GvilleCub
    People continue to suckle on Dumpster’s teat as if it were Salma Hayek’s. He gave up 6 hits, 4 walks, and 6 ERs in under 5 innings today, but it’s not his fault. Couldn’t be. No, instead the sucklers look at his sub 3.00 ERA, his still sparkling 1.15 WHIP, his anemic run support and declare him the best EVAH. I gave up this battle long ago on message boards, but the fire still burns. Dumpster puts the over in rated. If only the Cubs could somehow maroon him on Gilligan’s Island. Or at least Des Moines. One last year and perhaps, finally, we’ll be done with him. Free at last, Free at last, thank God Almighty, they’ll be Free at last. You think he sucks, but you then admit that he has a great ERA and WHIP and has had anemic run support? Which is it? I’m not calling you a suckler, but sucklers certainly view the glass as half full. The milk certainly tastes better that way. The reality is that Salma is 45, and her milking days are coming to an end. As will Dumpster’s days with the Cubs. Soon. Very soon.
  6. GvilleCub
    People continue to suckle on Dumpster’s teat as if it were Salma Hayek’s. He gave up 6 hits, 4 walks, and 6 ERs in under 5 innings today, but it’s not his fault. Couldn’t be. No, instead the sucklers look at his sub 3.00 ERA, his still sparkling 1.15 WHIP, his anemic run support and declare him the best EVAH. I gave up this battle long ago on message boards, but the fire still burns. Dumpster puts the over in rated. If only the Cubs could somehow maroon him on Gilligan’s Island. Or at least Des Moines. One last year and perhaps, finally, we’ll be done with him. Free at last, Free at last, thank God Almighty, they’ll be Free at last.
  7. GvilleCub

    Dempster

    GvilleCub replied to Tim's topic in Chicago Cubs Talk

    BOO! What a trick on the eve of Halloween. I was hoping that Dumpster would end up being the compensation for Theo. Maybe it can still happen... This is the worst news since Ryan "the Weasel" Theriot backed into a World Series Ring.
  8. GvilleCub
    Seriously. How [expletive] hard is it to field your position at pitcher? Every time Garza pitches in a game and ends up in a position to have to make a fielding play, I am reminded of one of the all-time great quotes, attributable to the legendary Pedro Guerrero. Mr. Guerrero was asked one time what he's thinks about while playing in the field (3rd base primarily). His response, "What do I think about? I'm thinking I hope that they don't hit it to me."
  9. GvilleCub
    Whenever the Cubs are pasted like today’s 10-Nil drubbing (congrats Barcelona!), I’m always disappointed to find out when Dumpster didn’t start. I feel bad when people like Wells and Coleman get pounded. Actually, I hope Dumpster keeps improving his season stats because I really want the Cubs to be sellers, and I hope Rhino is the first one to go. KC needs all sorts of pitching help and they may want to make a move sooner than later. It’s too bad Alex Gordon is probably no longer available.
  10. GvilleCub
    I’m banned. Wow. I didn’t know. Someone forgot to send me the memo. Who’s slacking? :) I haven’t posted about Dumpster because it isn’t necessary. Who needs to dump on Dumpster when he handles the task so well on his own? Dumpster: You know him. You love him. (Blaster he ain’t though!). Corollary: You wanted him. You have him. Ouch. Go Starlin! Work on that fielding! Wake me when Hendry and Dempster have been DFA. You may now return to your 2011 Chicago Cubs…
  11. GvilleCub
    Yeah, these past 102 years have been the roughest 102 years of my life. I mean 1907 and 1908 were great years, but watching this team has been rough ever since, but If suffered this long, so why stop now? Exactly the spirit! If you've lost for 102 years, what's another few in the grand scheme of things? Let the Quade era begin!
  12. GvilleCub
    i guess Gville has an alt login Naah. I don’t have time to waste on the Cubs and certainly don’t have time to waste making alts on message boards. But when I saw today’s final, I just had to see how many runs Dempster gave up. I was disappointed to see that it was just 7 (well only 3 earned for the Dempster lover!). So if anyone else is bashing Dempster, perhaps some other Cub fans are starting to come around. I mean, losing for 102 years really is trying on the soul and leaves you numb to pain and suffering, but you figure they’ll get tired of pulling for a loser after a while. Even if it’s a long while. I’ll leave some room on the bus for you. Remember that Dempster, in August, went 4-0 (in 5 starts) and put up the following sparkling line: 34.1 IP, 22 hits, 10 BBs, 29 K’s, WHIP 0.938! (compared to a season average ~ 1.29). That's #1 pitcher stuff! Accentuate the positive! Still I'm positive that the Cubs will be better in 2011 if Dempster was shot toward the sun in an Ares rocket (oops, can't do that, program was cancelled by the visionary thinkers in the White House), but the Russians need the money and probably have the time. Or a trade to Kansas City. Either will do...
  13. GvilleCub
    I will be busy at work today and will not have time to follow or comment upon the game until this evening, but given the Cubs' current 7 game losing streak, I wish Dempster all the luck he can muster. He will certainly need it.
  14. GvilleCub
    I wish Castro could play all 9 positions. Maybe he could be cloned, sort of like Michael Keaton was in Multiplicities. On days Dempster is supposed to pitch, he can pitch too...
  15. GvilleCub
    According to a Twitter feed from baseball writer Jeff Fletcher, the deal sending Lilly, Theriot, and cash to the Dodgers for Blake DeWitt and assorted spare parts is done. Ding, Dong, the Witch is Dead! Theriot's odiousness almost matched that of Todd Hundley and ANYTHING getting him off the team makes the Cubs instantly better. Good luck in LA, Ted.
  16. GvilleCub
    Another classic outing by Dempster tonight. I’m sure it’s not his fault because a) It’s Coors. It’s a band box! They scored 17 runs so it has to be a band box! And all the walks can be blamed on gravitational differences at high elevations. b) Russell pitched great: 2 innings, 3 K’s, no ERs, but the one hit allowed was in one of those Inherited Runners Situations, and, poor Dempster, let down by the bullpen again… Dempster ISN’T terrible. What he is, is quite mediocre. What makes him terrible is he is treated (by some) as something far better than that. He and the Cubs would still be best served if he were left in Colorado when the team leaves on Sunday. I might leave him bus fare. Too bad about Cashner. He looks to have hit a wall. Hopefully, he's not injured, but it looks like he needs a break, possibly back in the minors. Whatever way, they need to do something so that doesn't end up duplicating Samardzija who soared high, and fell even farther, out of the box.
  17. GvilleCub
    Dumpster sucks but get continues to get lucky, and, as Dumpster well knows, it’s always better to be lucky than good. Dumpster apologists will again say it’s ok for Dumpster to give up homeruns to Pujols because, well, because he’s the mighty Pujols and his crap is so hallowed that even angels wouldn’t dare to tread. Nice throw (and non-drop) by Byrd/Soto combination to end the 6th. Castro showed earlier why he is one of the only reasons one would subject themselves to these games on a daily basis.
  18. GvilleCub
    Nice comeback win for the Cubs tonight. Wouldn't have thought it was in them, but they played pumped from the 5th inning on. Of course, I'd be pumped too if I knew Dumpster was out of the game, and, of course, just knowing Lou's days are OFFICIALLY numbered has got to help. Keep up the good work and welcome back Aramis.
  19. GvilleCub
    Dumpster sucking again, what a surprise (cue the Dumpster apologists here). In order of the top 4 people who most need to be removed from the Cubs: 1) Piniella (GONE!, even if too little, and much too late) 2) Hendry 3) Theriot 4) Dumpster If Marshall would go back to the rotation, I would have Dumpster on the first ice floe that could be launched towards Canada from Navy Pier.
  20. GvilleCub
    After today's game, there's only one thing that can be said... "Fire Dusty!" Wait a minute... At least Dumpster still sucks. There isn't any Cub player I want to see hurled into the center of the sun more than him. And if Futurama can come back, anything is possible.
  21. GvilleCub
    Normally, anything happening that could hasten the end of the Piniella/Hendry era would have to viewed as a positive development for the Cubs, but now that I have the sneaking suspicion that Ricketts will make us long for the return of the Wrigley family, I'm not so sure it matters...
  22. GvilleCub
    In the only thing of interest in this game, Castro will have to get a hit or walk in his last AB (or perhaps 2 more chances) to keep alive his streak of reaching base safely which now stands at 8 games...
  23. GvilleCub
    I don't believe DERREK Lee stinks. I also think he's more likely to turn it around than Ramirez. But the truth remains that Derrek Lee's best hit in Wrigley came 7 years ago... And he was a Marlin...
  24. GvilleCub
    Fontenot is batting the emptiest .323 in the history of baseball.
  25. GvilleCub
    Whatever happens, it's probably Soriano's fault.
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