Exile on Waveland

As a fan of both the Cubs and IU basketball (Mike Davis), I'm inherently qualified to answer this question: NEVER

Thanks. Glad to be here. It's weird, I feel like I know all the posters here from reading so much -- even going back to the horrific, mind-numbing, breaking news! espn.com/cubs.com days -- but I'm a total stranger to everyone else. I'm going to try and remedy that.

Long, long time lurker, first time poster. (In fact, this is my first-ever post at any site). I'd like to apologize in advance for any typos, as my right arm is broken (with impeccable timing, I might add, on my first day of law school). All right, formalities concluded... This much is certain: C -- Barrett 1B-- Lee 3B -- Ramirez This is a near-certainty: 2b -- Walker (Not sure if his option is mutual or not; either way, he'll surely pick it up, as will the Cubs) That leaves SS and the OF as uncertain: SS -- Garciaparra. Unless another team gives him a ridiculous offer, the Cubs will resign him. Hopefully, Neifi will be gone, so, when Nomar's inevitable injury comes, Cedeno will get that time. LF -- Lawton. Damon will stay in the AL East -- either resigning with the BoSox or moving to the Yankees. Cubs will probably choose either Lawton or Burnitz. I'm predicting that Lawton continues his solid play at leadoff, which the Cubs value highly, so he'll be kept. CF -- Patterson. A couple of weeks ago, I figured Patterson had played his final game for the Cubs. However, he's getting called back up (we think) and Hendry still likes him (I think). Pie is clearly an option here. I've tried to think rationally and keep my personal opinions out of this, but I hope it's not Pie at CF on opening day. Everything I've read says he needs more time. Please, Hendry, give it to him. RF -- This is the most disputable position. Murton, Burnitz and Giles are all possibilities. Process of elimination: Dusty will still be the manager, so no Murton; Burnitz's option is, like, $9 million; and 34-year-old Giles will command at least three years. I'm going to hypothesize none of these options and go with a trade. A plethora of valuable Cub prospects will be Rule V eligible, therefore, a trade is imminent, in order to avoid Sisco Redux. I want Dunn (ha, big surprise at this board). It'll be Kearns, though. C -- Barrett 1b -- Lee 2b -- Walker SS -- Garciaparra 3B -- Ramirez LF -- Lawton CF -- Patterson RF -- Kearns I'm sure I'll be totally wrong about everything, but, hey, so is our manager. Sorry for the complete and utter lack of brevity. A (soon-to-be) lawyer pontificating, whodathunkit?