Long-time lurker, first-time poster. Finding out that Kerry was as good as gone, replaced by a guy with two first names who tied for the league lead in blown saves (9) pretty much made me want to: a) cry like a little girl b) act like a bitter [expletive] for the rest of the day, and/or c) pray to God/Allah/FSM that this is the precursor to a deal involving Peavy, Roberts, Abreu, or at least SOMEBODY that warrants kicking our current Mr. Cub to the curb. To be honest, I don't think that any of the players mentioned in © is the miraculous answer to our "100-year itch." I think that signing Demp and Woody, along with dumping Marquis in favor of one of the A-list starters on the market (ie Sabathia, Sheets, Peavy et. al...and while I'm dreaming I'd like a Lamborghini that runs on biodiesel and a supermodel Cubs fan with a libido like Wilt Chamberlin) would be a start. I'm on the fence as far as Roberts. Move DeRo to RF, platoon Fukudome and Johnson in CF, but I think we could do pretty well with Fontenot as our 2B/leadoff hitter. Hear me out. Roberts obviously has the overwhelming advantage as far as speed (which is obviously integral in the leadoff spot), but if you pro-rate MF's AB's to where Roberts' are, well, here are the numbers. I'm multiplying MF's stats by 2.51440329 to even out the AB's, so I know this is purely hypothetical, but, here goes... BR - 155G - 611AB - 107R - 181H - 51 2B - 8 3B - 9HR - 57 RBI - 40 SB - .296/.378/.450 MF - 155G - 611AB - 106R - 186H - 55 2B - 3 3B - 23HR - 101RBI - 5 SB - .305/.395/.514 I ain't sayin', I'm just sayin'. So, without the need for a new 2B or RF, we could have signed Woody, Dempster, and Peavy/Sabbathia/Sheets/Steve Carlton/Nolan Ryan/Cy Freakin Young. Aaaaaaand here would be your lineup (IMHO): 2B Fontenot 1B Lee 3B Ramirez LF Soriano C Soto RF DeRosa CF Johnson/Fukudome SS Theriot Bench: IF Cedeno IF/OF Hoffpauir C Blanco Rotation: SP Zambrano SP Lilly SP Harden SP Dempster SP Randy and/or Walter Johnson (or one of the aforementioned pipe dreams) Bullpen: RP Wood RP Marmol RP Samardzija RP Gaudin LP Cotts (meh) LP Marshall Then a possible pickup or two for the bench (or Roberts, bringing MF of the bench). Long-ass, first-post story short, I Miss Kerry.